TForc
Member Since: 07/26/15 Membership status: Member
Average Review Rating Given: starstarstarhalf-star


Reviews by TForc
The God of Thunder loved to party, loved to drink, and loved to spend some alone time with the Valkyrie (sometimes two at once). He'd been warned about consorting with them once and told he'd suffer the consequences the next time. What the God of Thunder didn't know was how severe the consequences would be.
Rated: Explicit 16 Reviews starstarstarstarhalf-star Story Incomplete Reads: 22248 Words: 16951 Chapters: 5 Table of Contents
Categories: Magical Gender Change
Characters: Male to Female, Teen (13-19 yrs)
Featured Items: Bikinis, High Heels
Locale: College, Family Household, Space or Foreign Planet
Motivation for Change: As Justice for a Crime
Personality: Bad to Good, Fights Change
Sexual Orientation: Becomes Only Attracted to Men
Story Theme: Comedy, Everyday Living, Mythical Setting
Type of Change: Fast/Instant Change, Stuck
Series: The Curse Universe
Published: 05/24/17
Updated: 09/05/19
Reviewer: TForc Signed
Date: 05/28/17 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

After the Marvel Cinematic Universe, we now have the Hikaro Literary Universe :)

I got to say, I really like where you are going this. And I have a soft spot for expanded universes.

The night life of students is always accompanied by the oft forgotten threat that comes with getting intimate and drunk with strangers. One final year student gets a lot more than he expected after a night out…
Rated: Deviant 4 Reviews starstarstarhalf-star Story Incomplete Reads: 3388 Words: 733 Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Categories: Magical Gender Change
Characters: Male to Female, Teen (13-19 yrs)
Turned Into: Child, Daughter, Teenager
Featured Items: School Uniform
Locale: College, High School
Motivation for Change: Accident, Curse
Personality: Fights Change
Sexual Orientation: Becomes Bisexual
Type of Change: Age Regression, Slow/Gradual Change
Warnings: Death, Intense Violence
Series: None
Published: 05/28/17
Updated: 05/28/17
Reviewer: TForc Signed
Date: 05/28/17 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Ready to Start

I don't know where you are going to take your story, but i really enjoyed your introduction. It really is a step up from all those "Hi, my name is John Smith, I'm X feet tall and i'm a nerd/jock/".

I usually don't like the part where the protagonist describe him/herself in front of the mirror (You look at yourself everyday in the same mirror, but this time you look at it like it is the first time, come on). But in your case it was relatively subtle, well done :)

Also your characters talk like students and not like they're reading of a script, which is nice.

In a world where all international problems are solved through a MOBA game played by enhanced humans, what happens when a neural implantation goes wrong and two unlucky gamers are forced to live in each other’s bodies?
Rated: Kid-Friendly 5 Reviews starstarstarstar Story Incomplete Reads: 3557 Words: 5839 Chapters: 2 Table of Contents
Categories: Sci-Fi Gender Change
Characters: Female to Male, Teen (13-19 yrs), Male to Female, Teen (13-19 yrs)
Turned Into: Daughter, Maid, Son
Featured Items: Maid Uniform, School Uniform, Work Uniform
Locale: High School
Motivation for Change: Accident
Personality: Fights Change
Sexual Orientation: Becomes Bisexual
Story Theme: Comedy, Coming of Age, Everyday Living
Type of Change: Body Swap
Series: None
Published: 07/11/17
Updated: 07/20/17
Reviewer: TForc Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 07/22/17 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Wow, you improved so much since the last chapter ! The story doesn't feel rushed anymore and the rythm is pretty good.

Though I might have a little issue with the way the caracters react, everyone is waaay too cool about it, especially the protagonist. But hey, if this kind of technology exists, I guess this type of problem wouldn't be unheard of.

Also you still have some syntax and grammar errrors here and there (you're/your/youre, "I and Ying" instead of "Ming and I", stuff like that). It doesn't hurt proofreading a few times before publishing. In particular if you know the kind of errors you are prone to make, you can do a proofreading pass concentrating only on that.

But once again, those are small problem, easily corrected. The whole of your work is awesome :)

Author's Response: I do proof read before uploading but I usually only do it once and it's also usually done at around 2 AM after writing for two hours so maybe I should work on that :P. Anyway, thank you very much for your comment. I'll be sure to take it into account when writing the next chapter

Reviewer: TForc Signed starstarstarstar
Date: 07/12/17 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

I like the concept, and I'm also a big fan of mind/body swap stories, I hope you'll do the subject justice ;)

However, I have a few little remarks: your writing seems a bit rushed, as if you want to get to the good parts as fast as possible. Pace yourself, add more backstory, maybe you'll find space to do the exposition a bit more subtlely.

Also, I find a tad unrealistic that Zion would only give the winners a day to prepare and get to the headquarters, especially for a world-wide/america-wide contest (the distinction between the UN and the american gov isn't clear, is that a commentary on american hegemony ? :p). And then your hero simply gets there, no explanation given, at 13yo, without even talking to his parents. As for the reveal of the government secret reveal, I'm pretty sure they would encounter some problem with the Geneva convention if determined to have employed children.

But I'm nitpicking, your story seems overall great and original :)
Keep up the good work !

Author's Response: Indeed this first chapter was a bit rushed, I just kind of wanted to finish and edit it quickly to use it as a sort of pilot for the rest of the story i'll try to make the next chapter much more detailed. Rowan is actually 16 by the way... As if that changes anything xD and the reason why Zion doesn't give much time to prepare is bothering because they are incredibly short on time and because both main characters are already more or less trained for the job due to being high ranking players. I could have explained that much better in the story but I'm honestly pretty bad at writing. Thank you so much for your review, it was really really helpful ^^

When Ander finds a strange mirror in the forest, he thinks it is an intriguing find. But when things start to change for him drastically, he soon realizes that he is in over his head.
In an instant, he is thrown into the lands of Galantis, where he discovers new secrets and meets mysterious people.
Rated: Adult 5 Reviews starstarstarstarstar Story Incomplete Reads: 5887 Words: 3583 Chapters: 2 Table of Contents
Categories: Magical Gender Change
Characters: Male to Female, Teen (13-19 yrs)
Turned Into: Fantasy Character
Motivation for Change: Accident, Curse
Personality: Fights Change
Sexual Orientation: Becomes Bisexual
Story Theme: Coming of Age, Fan Fiction, Mind/Body Posession, Mythical Setting, Witchcraft
Type of Change: Slow/Gradual Change
Series: None
Published: 01/26/18
Updated: 11/30/18
Reviewer: TForc Signed
Date: 01/27/18 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Ok, I have to ask: was your intro inspired by the beginning of the Eragon books ? If so, you definitely reproduced the feel of that scene :)

Author's Response: Aye, I wanted Ander's story to start the same way. But this is by no means a copy of Paolini's work. This story is my own and features my own characters, but there may be some inspiration drawn when it comes to writing the description. I hope it answers your question. I'm sorry I didn't mention this in the chapter notes.

In a world of superheroes and villains, Gavin McArthur feels like more of a shell than a person even after he transfers to a school for kids who are likely to soon posses an Alter form, a form that grants the user super powers and a different appearance. But what do you to do when your Alter form represents an uncomfortable truth about yourself that you're not prepared to face?
Rated: Adult 105 Reviews starstarstarstarstar Story Incomplete Reads: 63610 Words: 146638 Chapters: 17 Table of Contents
Categories: Sci-Fi Gender Change
Characters: Male to Female, Teen (13-19 yrs)
Turned Into: Daughter
Featured Items: Masks, School Uniform, Work Uniform
Locale: High School
Motivation for Change: Accident, Willing or Voluntary
Story Theme: Coming of Age
Type of Change: Fast/Instant Change
Series: None
Published: 02/25/19
Updated: 12/14/19
Reviewer: TForc Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 06/21/19 Title: Chapter 1: Lighting in a Bottle

Oh wow! I loved that eighth chapter ! The trans part by Cass was especially well written. In fact, I think that had you written that story/chapter a few years earlier, you might have managed to break my egg ^^

After having a fight with his family, Eric finds himself alone on the beach during the Emergence. Now a young woman, Ella must learn to control her newfound powers while trying to survive the ensuing chaos. A Kammiverse fanfiction, posted with the permission of Rosilys Inknose herself.
Rated: Explicit 13 Reviews starstarstarstarstar Story Incomplete Reads: 2819 Words: 5598 Chapters: 2 Table of Contents
Categories: Sci-Fi Gender Change
Characters: Male to Female, Teen (13-19 yrs)
Turned Into: Daughter, Fantasy Character, Twin
Motivation for Change: Unknown
Sexual Orientation: Does Not Change
Story Theme: Fan Fiction, Romance
Type of Change: Fast/Instant Change, Stuck
Warnings: Death, Intense Violence
Series: None
Published: 06/18/19
Updated: 06/30/19
Reviewer: TForc Signed
Date: 06/19/19 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1: What Once Was

Another Kammiverse story ! o/ I'm addicted to that stuff. I really like the way your story is going, especially the affinity with the ocean/water :)

Author's Response: Technically this isn't officially a Kammiverse story. I haven't earned that right yet, nor is it likely I ever will. Rosilys Inknose and Trashlyn decide what stories they wish to make canon. Thanks for the support, though! :D

A Panhellenic investigator visits GAT and Audrey's sister has some questions
Rated: Adult 7 Reviews starstarstarstarstar Story Incomplete Reads: 6086 Words: 17472 Chapters: 13 Table of Contents
Categories: Realistic Gender Change
Characters: Male to Female, Teen (13-19 yrs)
Series: None
Published: 07/15/19
Updated: 08/17/19
Reviewer: TForc Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 07/28/19 Title: Chapter 6: Chapter 6

Frickin' Checkov's gun! I swear I lost it at that subtle reference ^^

You'd expect the world to end with a bang, and... well if you squint it sorta did. For Evan though, his life is just beginning in this new and changed world. How will humanity fare without the pillars of technology that they have built their society upon? How will Evan deal with not just being turned into a girl, but a potent mage with the moon as a sidekick to boot? How will Fiona deal with the clumsiest newly minted girl alive?
Rated: Explicit 33 Reviews starstarstarstarstar Story Incomplete Reads: 19950 Words: 27741 Chapters: 9 Table of Contents
Categories: Magical Gender Change
Characters: Male to Female, Young Adult (20-26 yrs)
Motivation for Change: Accident, Willing or Voluntary
Sexual Orientation: Becomes Only Attracted to Women, Does Not Change
Story Theme: Mythical Setting, Romance
Type of Change: Fast/Instant Change
Warnings: Death, Intense Violence
Series: None
Published: 07/30/19
Updated: 08/28/19
Reviewer: TForc Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 07/30/19 Title: Chapter 4: Chapter 4: The Bathtub That Didn't Explode

Oh wow! I love where this is going (as usual with your stories ;). Is this part of the Kammiverse ? And your writing, it's just sooo good, it flows so naturally, I'm just immediately sent to a world of imagination by your words :)

Wanting to help him escape the dreary life of the future, as well as a bad break up, Terry's twin sister drags him into the latest VRmmo. The intention was to distract, but when Terry agreed, he could never have known the adventure of self discovery he'd be dragged into.
Rated: Explicit 222 Reviews starstarstarstarstar Story Incomplete Reads: 151267 Words: 190907 Chapters: 45 Table of Contents
Categories: Sci-Fi Gender Change
Characters: Male to Female, Young Adult (20-26 yrs)
Turned Into: Twin
Motivation for Change: Accident, Willing or Voluntary
Sexual Orientation: Becomes Only Attracted to Women, Does Not Change
Story Theme: Romance
Type of Change: Mechanical Device, Slow/Gradual Change
Warnings: Intense Violence
Series: Troubleverse
Published: 09/19/19
Updated: 01/19/20
Reviewer: TForc Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 09/23/19 Title: Chapter 7: Chapter 7: Silk Bras

How are you so talented !? All of your stories always make me grin like an idiot !

And goddess help me if Florence ends up being an OP gay firecaster, I'm unto your shenanigans

TG Storytime uses the eFiction engine and Vanilla discussions. Design by J6P.