You must login (register) to review.
Reviewer: helzblack Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 11/25/20 06:37 am Title: Chapter 1

It would be really nice if billy got back at his sister. I mean there are like a million stories in this site where that doesn't happen. A little bit less cliched and a lot more creative, an ending where the protagonist gets to fight back!

Reviewer: Penned Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 11/24/20 04:27 pm Title: Chapter 1

If billy is stuck, you should have the parents remember.

Reviewer: samantha rebecca clarkson Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 11/24/20 06:51 am Title: Chapter 5

wow, that was a change i was not expecting, So now what will laura do? is she locked out of the programme or is she able to change her family to recognise the new emma?

Author's Response: I haven't started writing the next chapter yet. What do you want me to do?

Reviewer: samantha rebecca clarkson Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 11/22/20 12:38 am Title: Chapter 1

Well i have been thinking where you can take this, You could make laura in to daddies girl and he takes her to football/soccer.

Emma could be made younger with a muscle problem that need her to do all girly sports like ballet, gymnastic. also you could have Emma with a wear bladder and have to wear pullup/diaper.

so both laura gets what she wants a cute sister that her mother can make as girly as she wants and she as a tomboy and daddie girl

Reviewer: samantha rebecca clarkson Signed Report
Date: 11/21/20 02:04 pm Title: Chapter 4

another interesting chapter, i hope you do make her a little bit younger and that her mummy treats her like a little doll she is.

Author's Response: Thanks a lot for reviewing a few times! It's nice to see people enjoying my story, especially as it's the first time I've written any. Let me know what could make it better for you

Reviewer: evangelkyo Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 11/20/20 02:17 pm Title: Chapter 4

quit fun so far, you never anger your little sister, it's always bad for you after.

Reviewer: KagatoAC Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 11/20/20 12:58 am Title: Chapter 4

Cute and fun, I just wonder how the parent didn't notice the changes if laura didn't have the ability to change them.

Author's Response: oh yeah, I forgot to put that in the warning when she was applying changes. Thanks a lot for reviewing. Is there anything you want to see happen?

Reviewer: brogreenman Signed Report
Date: 11/19/20 11:01 pm Title: Chapter 1

Emma could discover the app on the tablet, Laura gets transform into a younger male maybe.. possibly a baby boy. I can see Emma/Billy getting revenge once he discovers it.

Reviewer: Jet Signed Report
Date: 11/19/20 05:23 pm Title: Chapter 1

Hm, guess, the only thing left for Billy to do is to kill that monstrosity called Laura and make it as painfully as possible. Can't really think of anything else somehow.

Author's Response: I'm sorry if you don't like it, what sort of stories do you like? And could you give me any critique on my writing? I noticed you're good at that in some of your other reviews

Reviewer: flowerboy Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 11/19/20 12:45 am Title: Chapter 2

really really love this!! I just wish it went on longer! seems like it was ending right as it got to the fun part!

Author's Response: Tell me which part was the fun part and I'll see what I can do. Also, it's not finished yet, anything could happen.

Reviewer: samantha rebecca clarkson Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 11/17/20 01:49 pm Title: Chapter 2

another great chapter, i hope she calls her something cute and changes the rest of the family

Author's Response: You've made my day saying that. As a thanks, have you seen the end of chapter 3 yet? I just uploaded it.

Reviewer: Gwenington Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 11/17/20 10:31 am Title: Chapter 1

FUN

Author's Response: THANK YOU! What do you like best?

Reviewer: The Syndicate Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 11/17/20 06:12 am Title: Chapter 2

Great going! But didn't quite expect for the changes to apply so soon in the real world. Do continue the story. You could probably make the Billy younger/ shorter than Laura and make Laura more dominant, make them play a few games with the tab, basically bring in a few changes. Can't wait to see how the story would continue!

Author's Response: Yeah, I guess I changed a bit from what the title said. I didn't really know what to call it tho. Thanks to you and the others reviews, instead of ending it after 3 chapters, I'll be doing more, the tablet will definitely get used more as you can almost see in chapter 3 now.

You must login (register) to review.
TG Storytime uses the eFiction engine and Vanilla discussions. Design by J6P.