Date: 06/26/20 12:56 pm Title: Runion
"I don't know what happened to the one who was guarding Amanda. Probably an orphan, possibly homeless, if he/she has enuf sense, she'll seek out whatever kind of help is available for runaway kids in New York state. As for James/Janice, the Goddess teleported her to a police station so she could carry out her instructions. She would have been placed with childrens' aide, and either foster care or something like that. She'd be treated as an orphan but would be taken care of by the system, such as it is. As for why they were made to look more or less like the twins, that was sort of 'poetic justice', like "you've become that which you were trying to harm". And also I guess as decoys incase the other baddies were still looking for Sadie & Amanda?"
This reminds me of when Scott was turned into Cindy. Cindy was left with no identity and living on the streets, homeless. While we know that Scott did something horrible and was being punished for it, that didn't stop Jess from sympathizing with Cindy, having also had to live on the streets herself. So why is it okay to reach out to Cindy and help her out, even after what she did to Jess, but nobody is helping James/Janice and the other guy/girl, who also were doing something horrible, out of a similar awful and cruel situation, sad and alone either homeless or being stuck in foster care? I'm not sympathetic to the two guys, but I also wasn't sympathetic to Cindy either and she was given a helping hand and a chance to redeem herself.
Date: 06/26/20 12:35 pm Title: Runion
" i didn't see Amanda as being b***** about the situation, I think she was shocked and freaked out,and it took her a while to adjust. But by the end of Taste of Dysphoria (eg. just over a month after she met Sadie) she'd more or less accepted Sadie, apart from some teasing & some reluctance to call her 'sister'. Tho from Sadie's diary we know that it wasn't long afterwards that amanda got past that hurdle too."
I know that eventually Amanda accepts Sadie as her sister. And I understand Amanda being shocked and freaked out about finding out that her Dad is now her twin sister. What bothers me is that she acted with hostility to Liz and Sadie. Feelings of shock is understandable. But her nasty hostile attitude was unnecessary and just flat out mean and cruel. I feel bothered that that was her first reaction to finding out that her Dad was trans and magically transitioned into a 16 year old girl. A bit unusual of a gender transition, but still a gender transition nonetheless. So I feel it's kind of telling that that was Amanda's knee jerk reaction to finding this out. That's why her initial reaction bothers me. That and the fact Amanda initially reacted that way wasn't addressed more and seems to just be swept under the rug like it never happened, now that Amanda has accepted Sadie and is being nice to her.
Date: 06/26/20 12:21 pm Title: Runion
"Liz's motivations have mostly been for herself. Not always, she's not like completely nasty, but she seems to think about herself first, and then her kids second."
I get what you're saying about Liz putting her own happiness ahead of her children's, but I feel like she was having a hard time finding any happiness. Probably feeling lonely since her husband was "dead" and then her husband, now daughter, just moving on to a new girlfriend while Liz had nobody as she tried to raise 3 teenage girls by herself. That all probably led her to the dark place she ended up in, where she was no longer caring about the well-being of her children. I'm not saying she wasn't in the wrong for how she was acting. I'm just saying she needed somebody to talk to. Some grief therapy. Not to have her life as Liz prematurely cut short and turned into a 12 year old girl with no memory, having to go through life all over again. I understand she should be punished for her actions, but even though the coven could have done worse, I still feel this was too harsh of a punishment. Maria probably could have gotten custody of the kids without killing off Liz or using any magic at all. It's not like Liz could fully explain the family's situation in court without sounding insane, which could have caused Liz to lose custody of the kids as well.
I feel like Liz's life was messed with due to magic and instead of anybody stepping in to help her deal and manage her feelings, she was just left alone to deal with her loneliness as she tried to raise her kids all on her own. The loneliness is what probably led her to date somebody like James. So lonely, she was willing to date anybody, no matter how toxic the guy is. Just saying, somebody needed to reach out to Liz and help her out with her mental health, but it seems like nobody did.
Date: 06/12/20 03:19 am Title: Runion
Also, what is Beth's relations to the Jenny, Amanda and Sadie? I was thinking sister, but the newspaper clipping said that Elizabeth Watson left behind three daughters and Beth's full name is also Elizabeth Watson. So does that mean Beth is a cousin of theirs then? Just curious.
Author's Response: We'll be finding out more about Beth, the other girls, & their relationships soon! ^^ I have a much larger project in the works that's a kinda big sequal to the whole Witches of Welland setting.
Date: 06/12/20 03:11 am Title: Runion
Well, I imagined much worse was going to happen to Liz. I'm glad it didn't. I'm glad she's getting a second chance and that while her memories are gone for now (though she does have a little bit of memory to at least know she used to be a grown up woman with kids), her memories will come back to her "after she has had time to grow and learn" (whatever that means). Not sure how long that'll be, but at least she eventually will be able to remember her old life, which I think seems fair. I actually think Liz/Beth finally remembering her old life would be an interesting story to read. Like where would Liz/Beth be in her life and how would her getting her memories back affect the rest of the family.
Date: 06/12/20 02:47 am Title: Confrontation
*sigh* Poor Liz. Her anger and sadness led her to be consumed by her grief. What she really needed was grief counseling, though I don't know how she would discuss any of this with a therapist. I hope the Goddess doesn't do anything horrible to her. I know Liz has done some bad things. Grief makes us do and say things we don't mean. I'm not saying Liz is innocent. Just saying that she's not some evil monster.
Also, what happened to James/Janice and the the guy who was holding Amanda hostage? Do they now have families to live with? Foster families? Or are they orphans now? Where did they go after the events of this story? And why do they look similar to Sadie and Amanda?
Author's Response: I don't know what happened to the one who was guarding Amanda. Probably an orphan, possibly homeless, if he/she has enuf sense, she'll seek out whatever kind of help is available for runaway kids in New York state. As for James/Janice, the Goddess teleported her to a police station so she could carry out her instructions. She would have been placed with childrens' aide, and either foster care or something like that. She'd be treated as an orphan but would be taken care of by the system, such as it is. As for why they were made to look more or less like the twins, that was sort of 'poetic justice', like "you've become that which you were trying to harm". And also I guess as decoys incase the other baddies were still looking for Sadie & Amanda?
Date: 06/12/20 02:40 am Title: Runion
A really happy and satisfying end to the trilogy. It's good to see that Liz learned the error of her ways and was willing to make amends for it. I would have liked to see more of Beth settling into the family, but we saw enough to get the point across and I'm happy with what we got.
Date: 06/09/20 12:11 pm Title: Confrontation
Awesome chapter, I see Maria is going to be a single mother of 4 girls! And have a new home.
Author's Response: Legal guardian anyways, actually adopting / becoming their mother would be another step entirely. But yeah, she's got her hands full now! ^^
Date: 06/09/20 12:27 am Title: Confrontation
Fuck, this was rough and intense but so good. Love this world you've created ,clearly we're seeing consequences now that I most certainly wasn't expecting when this series started out, but you've done it wonderfully. ^^
Author's Response: Thank you! <3
Date: 06/05/20 05:46 am Title: Love, Hate
I don't see Liz as a villain. In fact, I don't see anyone as a villain. Just some people who've made some bad decisions.
David was wrong for keeping her daughter from being able to transition, which upset his sister, Maria, and she cast a spell on him to temporarily make him a girl to see what it's like to have gender dysphoria. The spell didn't work out the way Maria had hoped and instead made David feel more comfortable being a girl. And when Maria turned David back to himself, that's when he ended up experiencing gender dysphoria. To help David, the witches made him/her into Sadie, his own 16 year old daughter permanently. This way, she could be a girl and still be with her family. When she realized her feelings about wanting to be a girl were because of the spell Maria cast, it wasn't like she could do anything about it except move forward. Especially since she's made a life for herself as Sadie, including having a girlfriend she really loves. So while it was wrong for David to deny his daughter her right to transition, it was also wrong for David's/Sadie's right to free will to be taken away because of the spell.
Maria turned David into a girl to teach him a lesson about gender dysphoria, but ended up cursing him into wanting to be a girl. So I understand why she feels guilty, but she meant well and did not mean any harm to her brother/niece. She did really intend to turn him back. And I think constantly telling her it's not her fault isn't going to alleviate her guilt.
Liz accepted that David wanted to be a girl because she thought that was she wanted, but then found out that David's desire to be a girl was magically induced as part of the spell Maria put him under. Which Maria and Sadie/David kept from her. I think Liz accepted David becoming Sadie because while she was losing her husband, the man she loved, he/she wasn't really going anywhere and would still be part of the family and David, in a way, would still be around. And Liz thought that this is what David really wanted, though she questioned whether his desire was part of the spell Maria put on him. To be fair, when the change from David to Sadie first happened, Liz accepted it better than Amanda did, since Amanda acted like a bitch to both Liz and Sadie. But now Liz has found out that not only was David's desire to be a girl happened because of Maria's spell, but Sadie/David is thinking and acting less and less like the person she loved and more and more like a typical teenage girl. So it's like she's lost the person she loved and is now it's truly really is like he died. Not only that, but she was lied to about it. So while I understand her anger and her reasons behind the anger, she's definitely letting her anger get the best of her, to say the least. Liz definitely needs to deal with her anger better, but her anger is understandable.
I just feel so bad for this family. So much chaos in this family. So much hurt feelings. All because of an attempt at a well intention reversible spell only meant to teach a lesson. Maybe, the witches could do a spell that splits Sadie into two people, Sadie and David. This way, the family will have their husband/father back and Sadie can continue to enjoy her life as a happy teenage girl. I know that's wishful thinking, but I just feel so bad for how messed up things are for this family.
Author's Response: Yeah that's kinda the thing. Like, there were mistakes, and they had consequences. But like, how people react & deal with those consequences is what makes the difference. In the end, Sadie wanted / needed to do something for herself, she needed to be Sadie. But her family has been just as important to her, like keeping the family together has always mattered to her. And she eventually recognized that how she'd acted originally towards Jenny was bad, esp. when she saw that playing out with Ashley's situation later. She even said in Taste of Kismet, that what happened to her was worth it because it led to both Jenny & Ashley receiving magical transitions. otoh Liz's motivations have mostly been for herself. Not always, she's not like completely nasty, but she seems to think about herself first, and then her kids second. FWIW i didn't see Amanda as being b***** about the situation, I think she was shocked and freaked out,and it took her a while to adjust. But by the end of Taste of Dysphoria (eg. just over a month after she met Sadie) she'd more or less accepted Sadie, apart from some teasing & some reluctance to call her 'sister'. Tho from Sadie's diary we know that it wasn't long afterwards that amanda got past that hurdle too.
Date: 06/03/20 03:14 am Title: Love, Hate
Well I for one think Liz's reaction here makes more emotional sense than in the original story. Her real estate gig seems pretty sweet though, so she should be grateful to the coven for that.
But where did she find this James guy? Why do I think he knows more than he's letting on, and he brings his own agenda?
Author's Response: James was first mentioned in chapter 1 of Taste of Kismet. He didn't appear in the story but Liz sold him several homes and other real estate.
Date: 06/02/20 06:32 am Title: Love, Hate
Just want to say that your stories have really been a pleasant read, and I was excited to find after coming back from a 6 month hiatus that you're still doing this series, even if it's gone in a slightly different direction! Good job on the tension in this chapter.
Date: 05/26/20 09:14 am Title: Uncovering Secrets
The back 40% of this story is very compelling, Liz realizing that the person who was once her husband has had her mind tampered with is a compelling plot for this story as it puts us in a conflict where we can realistically understand both sides reasoning. Sadie is happy in her new life, Liz is upset that her husband was essentially completely overwritten in a magical accident. If the chapter were just that back 40% I'd have given this five stars, but unfortunately the first 60% or so isn't up to the same level. You spend a lot of time giving us details we don't really need to know, such as plainly stating exactly what each character is wearing and what their fashion sense is like despite it not really having any bearing on the plot. This ties in a lot to showing vs telling. For example when you mention Amanda's feelings on Liz's boyfriend:
"Saturday night mom had finally brought her new boyfriend home to have dinner with them. He hadn't really said or done anything wrong, but Amanda had gotten bad feelings from the guy every time he looked at her."
This would have been a great opportunity for a mini flashback to show these characters meeting, and exactly what sort of look he gave her that made her feel uncomfortable.
Another thing I would work on is diversifying the way you refer to your characters. For example in this story you refer to Sadie as "the brunette" four times, "the teen" four times, and "her brunette teen" once. Similarly you often refer to Cindy in your Cindy stories as "the small teen". Things like this aren't a huge deal, but working on them will really take your writing to the next level. I'm sorry if this criticism is coming off as too harsh. I'm being harsh because I think you are a really good at creating interesting plots, and improving your writing style would really take these already interesting plots to the next level.
Date: 05/26/20 03:26 am Title: Uncovering Secrets
Honestly, from the very beginning I have not liked Liz, and three stories in she has not done anything to change my mind. Everything she does comes across as narcissistic, uncaring, or selfish in some way, and it is basically impossible to sympathize with her. I hope, for her children's sake, that she actually grows up a little bit and starts acting like a goddamn responsible adult, but it's hard to imagine her as anything but unkind and a little neglectful, particularly towards Sadie. Maybe I'm projecting a little, but she's consistently felt like a villain this entire time.