Reviews For The Raven's call
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Reviewer: A_lurker Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/16/20 05:10 am Title: Chapter 31

Regarding the creating humans with magic dilemma, I can’t help but think of that scene in Full Metal Alchemist where Edward lists the full chemical makeup of a human, but states that something is still missing.

Reviewer: fireslug Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/13/20 01:49 pm Title: Chapter 1

Fantastic fantastic story. Very imaginative and top quality writing. Easiest 5 stars ever.

Just two pieces of constructive criticism though (warning for story spoilers through chapter 25-ish):

* The Frozen joke really broke the immersion of the story. Any mild chuckle you might induce in some of your readers isn't worth hurting the storytelling. As they say, kill your darlings.

* Some of the story premise is a bit too unbelievable. I don't mean the magical world and the TF, but the logic of the main plot. It's hard to swallow that Will was selected to be a familiar and completely coincidentally also happens to be a descendant of mages himself. It would make more sense if these events were directly connected (other than indirectly through Lady Milderd's hate). For example, Anna could have selected Will herself out of a lineup (maybe she had some magical intuition about him), or Will could have surprised himself and volunteered to team up with a mage (maybe he felt a "calling").

Someone (a Monty Python writer I believe) once spoke of the need for internal logic in a comedy sketch. I don't recall the example he gave, but I'll make one up: you could have a surreal setup where everyone in a business meeting is in a chicken costume, but if someone else is not a chicken then you need to explain why. Internal logic is arguably even more important in fantasy stories.

But still one of the very best stories I've ever read online.

Author's Response: Thank you

Reviewer: keepera Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/11/20 12:24 pm Title: Chapter 1

What a refreshingly new concept, and a wonderfully well-written work. I’m keenly interested in seeing how this turns out. Thanks for sharing this.

Author's Response: Thank you for your support :)

Reviewer: AlexaTiresias Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/10/20 01:32 am Title: Chapter 31

Great work as usual! I just wish the chapters were longer, especially now that you are not publishing multiple chapters a day. Blessed be.

Author's Response: Something's come up at work. So I'm not able to write as much as I'd like.I'll try to keep up the pace.

Reviewer: Maria Esperanza Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/07/20 08:33 pm Title: Chapter 30

I'm loving what's shaping up to be a wonderful epic romance. I look forward to Raveena and Geoff meeting again. :)

Reviewer: Kathryn Mayhew Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/06/20 07:55 pm Title: Chapter 29

Something tells me Geoffrey isn't about to be so forgiving... I actually feel badly for messania - her mom raised her to be cruel - and now that she's learning her lesson, far too many people believe she will stay cruel. I honestly hope things work out for her in the end - maybe she will get to marry that prince after all? I hope Geoffrey doesn't go too far - he must be hurting, but some things can never be unsaid. Some wounds linger forever.

Reviewer: Rose Gibson Signed Report
Date: 03/06/20 04:11 am Title: Chapter 1

Just excellent. Could we get get a little insight as to Messinas thoughts and feelings about Will before the fever?

Author's Response: Thank you Rose.

Reviewer: AlexaTiresias Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/06/20 02:08 am Title: Chapter 28

This is some really great character development for Messenia and Ravena!

Author's Response: Thank you Alexa

Reviewer: Magaso Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/04/20 11:26 pm Title: Chapter 25

Knew it was something about having a daughter/protege/apprentice

Author's Response: :)

Reviewer: Bri74 Signed Report
Date: 03/04/20 09:01 am Title: Chapter 22

🖤

Author's Response: :)

Reviewer: AlexaTiresias Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/04/20 02:35 am Title: Chapter 1

Awesome! I hope her and Geoffrey end up together, they are so sweet! Can’t wait for the next chapter! Goddess bless you.

Author's Response: Thank you for your support :)

Reviewer: Magaso Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/03/20 11:13 pm Title: Chapter 22

She lost a familiar, but gained a daughter.

Reviewer: Kathryn Mayhew Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/03/20 02:50 pm Title: Chapter 21

AWESOME!!!

Also... "Oh Geoffrey" - someone's got it hard... LOL. They'd honestly make a cute couple.

Author's Response: I think so too. We'll see how it goes :)

Reviewer: storylovinggamer Signed Report
Date: 03/01/20 10:07 pm Title: Chapter 18

Loving this!

Author's Response: :)

Reviewer: Rose Gibson Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/29/20 07:33 pm Title: Chapter 15

Wonderful pace and story rhythm. The characters are grounded and well defined. Your story is a delight to read. Please keep up the great work.

Author's Response: Thank you.. ;)

Reviewer: AlexaTiresias Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/29/20 03:01 am Title: Chapter 1

I hope that if and when piggy recovers, the knowledge that Will sacrificed himself for her might spur her to become a better human being and redeem herself, but I’m not holding my breath. Keep up the good work.

Author's Response: Thank you Alexa :)

Reviewer: Kathryn Mayhew Signed Report
Date: 02/28/20 07:55 pm Title: Chapter 12

Grrrrr.... Lady Mildred is a Psycho! I suspect Will is going to do the right thing - and somehow, justice will prevail, even if it takes decades.

Author's Response: Let's hope so...

Reviewer: Elron Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/28/20 02:22 am Title: Chapter 9

Specialized medicine is always so darn expensive. Probably where the expression "arm and a leg" came from.

Great job with the writing. You really know how to keep up the suspense.

Author's Response: Thank you Elron.

Reviewer: Elron Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/28/20 02:17 am Title: Chapter 8

It would be just like Piggy and her mom to blame Piggy's pneumonia on Will. I hope the blue-haired lady can fix things and spare Will the Royal Wrath.

Reviewer: Elron Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/28/20 01:51 am Title: Chapter 7

So nice of Rowan to take on extra duties in order to let (make?) Will rest his leg. Is that Karma throwing a little shade at Lady Piggy for all her nastiness towards Will?

Reviewer: Elron Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/28/20 01:47 am Title: Chapter 6

Good to see Will has another friend, he needs all the help he can get to deal with his lot in life.

Reviewer: Kathryn Mayhew Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/27/20 11:12 pm Title: Chapter 9

Cooooool! This is getting super interesting!

Author's Response: Ill try and upload couple more chapters today. :)

Reviewer: Kathryn Mayhew Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/27/20 02:35 pm Title: Chapter 6

Hey, Lone Elephant - This story ROCKS! It's really good, and I'd love to see more! I'm not sure I wish ms. Piggy any ill, like some of the other reviewers - although she is vile. Maybe whatever happens will teach her to be a better person - and if not, she reaps what she sowed.

Author's Response: Thank you Kathryn, as for piggy, we'll see how it goes..:)

Reviewer: Elron Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/27/20 12:09 am Title: Chapter 5

Will sure has a good heart and a great work ethic.

Reviewer: Elron Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/26/20 02:22 pm Title: Chapter 4

Very well written Chapter.
Sitting high on the horse, Miss Piggy is like a lightning rod. Maybe Mother Nature will throw a bolt of lightning at her?

Reviewer: Elron Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/26/20 05:45 am Title: Chapter 3

Wow, great backstory on all of the main characters. Very creative, and your writing is rock-solid. I also love Will's sense of humor, especially when it comes to Lady Piggy.

I see a magic deer turning Will into a beautiful girl to marry the Prince, and Lady Piggy into Miss Piggy so she can marry a boar - or a frog.

Author's Response: Thank you for you support..:)

Reviewer: Kathryn Mayhew Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/26/20 04:04 am Title: Chapter 3

Love the story so far! Please, do more when you're able. I can't wait to see how this goes!

Author's Response: Thank you for your support. I'll upload new chapters as soon as I'm able. I have to confess that I got caught up reading your story Birthrights and lost a little time :). Love the level of detail in your work.

Reviewer: Elron Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/25/20 05:22 am Title: Chapter 1

Great start! I already want to see Lady Messenia turned into a horse, or better yet, an actual pig. Oink! Please?

Author's Response: Thank you. I've uploaded the 2nd chapter. IDK when it becomes available. Enjoy:)

Reviewer: Narcissa Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/25/20 04:40 am Title: Chapter 1

Found it difficult though not impossible to read with all the ’ inserted throughout. Was this because of translation? In either case the writing was good beyond that and look forward to more.

Author's Response: Thank you for the review. I've managed to fix the errors in the story. I'm apologize for the initial errors. It was my first upload to this site ever. Still getting the hang of this.:)

Reviewer: Kathryn Mayhew Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/25/20 04:24 am Title: Chapter 1

So far the story looks like it might be a fun read - but its difficult to read with the formatting errors. All the " and ' have been replaced with garbled letters. This usually happens cause of a formatting error or a font being misinterpreted by the computer. If you fix that mess up the story will be a lot easier to read. (I had the same thing happen with my first e-novel and it sucked then too).

Author's Response: I've managed to fix the errors in the first upload. Hope you enjoy the story.:)

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