You must login (register) to review.
Reviewer: Juxtapos Signed Report
Date: 02/20/20 07:24 pm Title: Chapter 17

There is no such thing as a spring solstice, like fall it is referred to as an equinox. ;p

Reviewer: Day Dreamer Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/15/20 10:20 pm Title: Chapter 22

The only thing wrong with this story was that long chapters were posted frequently, pre-empting nearly everything else (grin)

I'm in awe of your skills as a writer. The creative plot, the complex weaving of various characters without losing the reader, the foreshadowing where necessary, the tension, surprises, and happy ending, all of it. I was surprised when suddenly major conflict popped open late, and even more surprised when the story went "complete" with one more chapter; yet I mentally ticked off one loose end after another that you tied up neatly, without belaboring nor leaving unresolved. Wow.

Reviewer: Amanda Lynn Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/15/20 04:45 am Title: Chapter 1

One story I am sad to see end. I looked excitedly everyday for an update. I began to love the characters, I will miss them.

Reviewer: Lailaluvs00 Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/14/20 10:38 pm Title: Chapter 22

Fantastic story! Couldn't put it down!

Reviewer: Roadbandit Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/14/20 10:23 pm Title: Chapter 22

Awesome storyline, thank you for writing it

Reviewer: ZZChromosome Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/14/20 09:58 pm Title: Chapter 22

Truly a phenomenal story. Thank you for writing it and choosing to share your art with us. I enjoyed it immensely and I'm putting the link in my "Just Wow" category, something I rarely do.

Reviewer: ZZChromosome Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/14/20 08:51 pm Title: Chapter 21

I have concluded, after reading Chapter 21 and much cogitation, that the Dark Brotherhood is evil.

But there is hope for David.

Reviewer: evenrude Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/14/20 04:06 pm Title: Chapter 1

This just might be one of the most interesting “sex change” fictions I’ve come across. Told in reasonable detail, the magic is subtle enough to almost make sense. No hocus pokes and the details arent really ignored, just left to the readers imagination. Plenty of mild eroticism and plenty of human interaction. Two guys, stuck as teenage girls, discovering all their petty atguments and the bloody realities of female life, including physical sex and even childbirth.

A long story that simply isn’t long enough for the reader.

Excellent.

Reviewer: evenrude Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/14/20 04:06 pm Title: Chapter 1

This just might be one of the most interesting “sex change” fictions I’ve come across. Told in reasonable detail, the magic is subtle enough to almost make sense. No hocus pokes and the details arent really ignored, just left to the readers imagination. Plenty of mild eroticism and plenty of human interaction. Two guys, stuck as teenage girls, discovering all their petty atguments and the bloody realities of female life, including physical sex and even childbirth.

A long story that simply isn’t long enough for the reader.

Excellent.

Reviewer: Lailaluvs00 Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/14/20 07:00 am Title: Chapter 21

Finally the trap is spring and the battle afoot! Great chapter!

Reviewer: Amanda Lynn Signed Report
Date: 02/14/20 04:27 am Title: Chapter 1

I knew David wasn't that bad a guy.

Reviewer: ZZChromosome Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/14/20 12:22 am Title: Chapter 15

Ch. 15 - First off, I'm loving this story. I am. Normally high school drama-centric stories simply bore me to tears, but this one doesn't bore me at all. It has me on the edge of my seat.

You're such an amazing storyteller, thank you for sharing your art with us.

Reviewer: Amanda Lynn Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/13/20 04:47 am Title: Chapter 1

Why do I have a feeling Jewel is pregnant?
She kinda had sex with him without direct penetration. Just a feeling.

Reviewer: Amanda Lynn Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/11/20 05:11 am Title: Chapter 1

Yes, you should have told her you love her. She loves you and is confused.
Getting to be one of my favorites.

Reviewer: Lailaluvs00 Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/09/20 08:46 pm Title: Chapter 16

That other shoe is coming soon!

Reviewer: Amanda Lynn Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/09/20 06:11 am Title: Chapter 1

No, Cora, it started out as revenge but you have found out that you really like Brandon, and not just as a friend, much more. You need to think on this. Get Cory out of your mind. It's your life now and you're happier, face it.

Reviewer: Roadbandit Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/08/20 09:06 pm Title: Chapter 16

Awesome storyline,I look forward to reading as u post new chapters. I only hope they figure out David is the brotherhood, but I’m thinking he might switch sides.

Reviewer: Amanda Lynn Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/07/20 01:10 am Title: Chapter 1

Oh my God, I want to kill those three. Please tell me they are found out.
I think Cora is developing feelings for Brandon. She just doesn't want to admit it yet.
I don't think David can stay evil.

Reviewer: Day Dreamer Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/04/20 02:53 am Title: Chapter 11

The broad, deep, and well-written exploration continues WAY beyond anything I hoped for. Very realistically presented against a fantasy world of magical rules -- but with well-considered rules, and history, that are believable and make the plot work.

Gotta feel sorry for Cory/Cora, but you covered that nicely, it was a series of unfortunate incidents that led to the outcome she and Erica are now wrestling with. I do find myself think, "well why wouldn't Erica also just come out and say THIS?" fully aware that even fully aware people often fail to say the best right thing at the right time, and regret it later. I mean, has Erica even explained to Cora why they're both so randy? Or maybe in the story it just doesn't matter, or it's obvious to them, or -- whatever.

The real point is that you've got me thoroughly enjoyed, rereading a lot, and feeling happy when I see a new chapter drop, wondering where we'll go next.

Oh, and "0wnz0ring", say WHAT? I had to look that up and apparently it's from a 2002 SF short story I never heard of? Easter eggs, no complaints here, fun!

Reviewer: Roadbandit Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/03/20 07:01 pm Title: Chapter 11

Excellent chapter, your doing a awesome job with the storyline.

Reviewer: Lailaluvs00 Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 01/31/20 01:35 am Title: Chapter 7

Wow, heavy stuff well done! Couldn't put this chapter down!

Reviewer: Roadbandit Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 01/30/20 07:01 pm Title: Chapter 7

Awesome chapter, I loved the new twist.

Reviewer: Amanda Lynn Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 01/29/20 06:12 pm Title: Chapter 1

Thought I saw the wall of not liking boys start cracking. How long before girls are only friends?
Keep writing, I like the mind perspective.

Reviewer: Roadbandit Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 01/29/20 04:33 pm Title: Chapter 6

I’m loving this storyline, well done

Reviewer: Amanda Lynn Signed Report
Date: 01/26/20 11:14 pm Title: Chapter 1

Like this idea. Erica is already finding her life is better.

Reviewer: Uncreative Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 01/26/20 09:28 pm Title: Chapter 1

Upon seeing the mention of this story being a rerun from another site, I couldn't help but scoot over there to read ahead. Some six hours later, I've reached the end and am still aching for more. This was a fantastic ride from start to finish and my chief complaint is my plans for the day are now utterly shot. Thank you so much for this fascinating story.

Reviewer: Day Dreamer Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 01/26/20 08:05 pm Title: Chapter 3

Perfectly well-written, pretty easy to follow and enjoy, including nice "realistic" explorations of the Transformation and Transition. Good dialog. Expanding plot. Unabashed happy sexual aspects too. Magic! Thanks for this story, looking forward to more, including Erica's continued surprises at her new situation, even as she adapts to it over time.

Reviewer: fireslug Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 01/26/20 11:24 am Title: Chapter 1

I wouldn't ordinarily review a long story after just two chapters, but I decided to give it a preliminary score for now since it certainly deserves more than the two stars it has. The writing is excellent and it's building on a true classic, so I'll give it four for now (and I can easily see it getting an upgrade to five). However, the author should really link to the original(s) in the first blurb:
chapters 1-6: http://www.nifty.org/nifty/transgender/by_authors/Mike_Allegretto/change-of-pace
chapters 6-27: http://tigger-n-brandy.net/text_stories/A_Change_of_Direction.html

On a side note, I'm baffled about what kind of people lurk here and rate stories. There are so many 4-5 star stories that seem to have been written by non-English speaking 12-year olds, while quality stuff (like this) gets trashed. Please keep it up optimizer - you only have three stories to your name so far, but you already have a fan club.

Reviewer: Terrigen Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 01/26/20 06:34 am Title: Chapter 1

I’ve read this story when it was posted on another site.

The story is good as a whole, but doesn’t get good until the later chapters, when a new character is introduced. This character is more interesting than the protagonist, and has a more interesting story arch.

It’s currently at one star, but I’m giving it a four as a whole. Honestly the biggest draw back to this story, was fitting it into this world. I’m not personally a fan of this world that’s set up. It has weird pregnancy rules and incest setups, that are out of place in the overall narrative.

As much as I dislike this universe, I’m giving it a four for the quality of the writing.

You must login (register) to review.
TG Storytime uses the eFiction engine and Vanilla discussions. Design by J6P.