Date: 06/16/20 07:58 pm Title: Chapter Thirteen: Epilogue
I really enjoyed this story, it brought a lot of depth and thoughtfulness, while still entertaining with humor, character development and a few bits o'sexytime ;)
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it! If you haven't done doo already, check out my other stories on the site!
Date: 05/14/20 03:12 am Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
"One day, in the small city of Corona, California, Elias notices something off about his mother."
"Corona," eh? Viral outbreak?
When did you write this?
I just noticed this. when did you write it?
Gives me shivers.
Author's Response: Who, yeah... that didn't even occur to me (I've written a lot since then). I believe I wrote this in March-April 2019, so a bit over a year ago. So maybe I'm a little bit psychic. Based on what I'm currently writing, you should watch out for... hmm... a World War I soldier who dies and is unexpectedly resurrected in the body of a fae princess in a strange magical world. So look out for that, I guess. :D
Date: 04/28/20 11:30 pm Title: Chapter Thirteen: Epilogue
I enjoyed this story quite a bit. It had much tighter pacing than On my Best Behavior, and I rather enjoyed the twist that Elle got smarter (or at least didn't get any dumber) from the disease. The avoidance of non-consent and the acknowledgment of the issues with the mental stuff are also great, although obviously present in other stories you write.
That said, those qualities of your writing--that it avoids so many problems that other media has--I think might be part of the reason you've been having such an issue with what you wrote in chapter 6.
As a trans reader, your stories are very comfortable to read. They're not trans stories in the way some other media on this site is--you're not trans, as far as I'm aware (correct me if I'm wrong), and your character's experiences do not seem to be based in such--but they're also not transphobic. They're empowering in a lot of ways and don't reproduce transphobic ideas. The issue is when you do touch upon problematic material--which chapter 6 does, there are problems with it--people aren't prepared for it. It's like a sucker punch. And so even though it's not as bad as some other material on this site, it hurts them a lot more.
I didn't struggle with it so much, but I have pretty high tolerance for this kind of stuff. And I'm not saying it's your fault, per say. Problematic material is not the same as transphobic material, and honestly this site was never designed for stories like this. The tags are useless and can't tell readers if the story contains material that might resurface old trauma.
Author's Response: Thanks for your input. Yes, this is definitely a tighter story than OMBB - that one started out all over the place and quasi-episodic and got a bit more focused as the story progressed. The sequel to OMBB, Consequences of Magic, is tighter overall, even if it is a similar length. Generally speaking, I don't go for "tight" pacing so much as for something that's enjoyable to write and to read. I'll identify something that's been a problem in my writing and use the story I'm currently working on to address it (e.g. in my current vampire story, I'm working on developing a villain who's both likable and an utter b******). And yes, you're right - I'm not trans. I'm genderfluid, and therefore transitioning would be basically pointless for me, since I present as male but don't feel much pull at all gender-wise... really, it depends on my mood and what's going on in my life. These stories are a way for me to explore those thoughts. And, while I post many of my site-theme-appropriate stories here, they're ultimately meant to be exercises in storytelling and plotting. Thus, I'm definitely not thinking of potential triggers and traumas when I am writing these stories - if I think it's appropriate or interesting to the story, I'll put it in. However, the feedback that I got from this story has convinced me to be more mindful of potential triggers and to address this problem in the Unusual Cases sequel (whenever I write it - currently, my Patrons are voting on what story I should write next). Thanks for reading!
Date: 02/21/20 02:25 pm Title: Chapter Thirteen: Epilogue
I was truly disappointed by the ending....not in any of the storypoints, grammar, or any of the normal things that disappoint people about other peoples' writing. No, I was disappointed merely by the fact that it was over! You truly got me caring about these people. I wanted more!
Great story...thank you for writing it! I look forward to reading much more from you in the future!
Author's Response: Thanks! I've got many more stories under my belt - the On My Best Behavior sequel is coming here soon! I doubt that, if I write a sequel to Unusual Cases, I'll post it here because I got a fair amount of very negative response to it. But I've got many other stories that I'd like to share.
Date: 02/15/20 04:45 am Title: Chapter Six: Internet Famous
I'm trans, and I'll echo what one other person said and say that after this chapter I can't read any more.
I don't think it's a bad or awful story, but just very, very not for me.
Different people read tg stories for different reasons. For me, I'm basically just looking for a fantasy where things that aren't possible in the real world can be achieved, and for some happy endings. The story very quickly became the exact opposite of that - it's even shittier than reality.
Also, this is speculation, and highly colored by my own experience, but I feel like the suicide rate would be higher than you're implying (~25%)
I could never be in the group that are okay with it, because the whole idea that my original body can be "fixed" is simply not the case. I didn't transition because I didn't like certain aspects about my body... I transitioned because there was absolutely no body of my birth sex that I could be comfortable with.
Now, hypothetically, the disease could "delete" my dysphoria somehow, and leave me happy in the new body... but this would not have the effect you think it would. Rapidly rewriting my personality like that would utterly horrify me. I would not feel like the same person any more. I would likely commit suicide at the earliest opportunity, it would be even worse than being dysphoric.
Also, since trans people know what fate awaits them, I doubt they would sit idly by and wait to be placed into the care of the agency workers. There would be many suicides within the first hour of symptoms manifesting. Certainly, some trans would be able to cope after having lots of support and being on suicide watch... but many simply would not live long enough to receive any support at all.
I think you should consider adding a disclaimer to the start of chapter 1, something like: "Warning: Some trans people find this story to be very dark, read with caution if you are trans."
Author's Response: I'm sorry that it's not for you. Obviously, the reaction has been very mixed, including among trans readers, with some readers having a *very* negative reaction to the story in response to a *very* small part of the story. Keep in mind that this all takes place in a fictional environment where a disease like this is even possible - a disease that *does* substantial alter the personalities of the affected persons. The AHS outbreak presented in the story seems like a big f****** deal, but it's something that's affected something like 100,000 people (So, roughly 1 in 25,000 adults) in the US... so it's not a tiny number, but it's not a national or worldwide pandemic, either. As I've pointed out previously, I brought up the effect this disease would have on trans people because I thought it was relevant, and because it's something that could be explored in the future. For instance, my vague long-term character arc is for Elle to become a biomedical researcher who figures out how to repurpose AHS to help people (while bad guys try to weaponize it). Surely, with that in perspective, it is worth reinterpreting the story rather than catastrophizing a very minor part of a sci-fi/smut story - I hope that I, as an author (and along with other authors on this site) deserve this much latitude rather than getting excoriated for writing traumatic body horror. In brief, I understand and am sympathetic with the reasons that you might not like this story, but I am not writing it from a bad place and, ultimately, I think that any story that's *already explicitly about exploring forced body changes* deserves the latitude to explore that idea in a thoughtful and respectful way.
Date: 02/14/20 05:43 pm Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
I’m completely against what most of this negativity is about. Honestly, I read this entire story and I’m profoundly happy with the shit ton of research you did in the science community to put a story plot like this together. This had very realistic themes and while a lot of people are bitching about it. The fact is if a virus like that DID exist, it would follow the lines you drew out for the story. I don’t get how people can get upset at a forced transition story for having forced transition of already transitioned people. That’s the storyline. You can’t be upset at the author because one forced transition is what you like but the other isn’t. That would be the real world affects of a virus. Viruses don’t give a shit about anyone or anyone’s feelings. Honestly I loved this story and I hope you write a sequel. I’d also very much like you to get back to “on my best behavior” though! If you ever needed an extra editor, I’d be very interested.
Author's Response: Thanks for the input! I tried my best to explore the idea of, essentially, a magical or weirdly sci-fi disease that changed people like this. I do have fairly detailed notes for a sequel, and I might start work on it soon, but I probably won't post it here because the negative response has been *so* negative. Next up: the sequel to On My Best Behavior. I think I'll post the first chapter to that sometime this weekend.
Date: 02/11/20 12:04 am Title: Chapter Twelve: Doctor Girlfriends
Those travel rules would be extremely onerous for people who live in small towns near a state line, where the nearest convenient city for shopping (and most of the available jobs) is across the state line. Phenix City, Alabama or Seekonk, Masschussets or the Chicago suburbs in southern Wisconsin.
Author's Response: This is true. In fact, I've lived in such an area before. Hopefully, AHS people in such situations can get special exceptions. But rules and regulations are often onerous and inconvenient. Otherwise, it's very unlikely that you'll get caught on any given time.
Date: 02/02/20 03:12 pm Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
You don't speak for all of us, Cassie. I often do want to read it for a degree of horror. Some of us are masochists. Many of us, in fact, judging by the content on this and other sites.
Author's Response: That's very true, and thanks for chiming in. If I'm reading the room right, it sounds like many people were blindsided by the more disturbing aspect of the story, which is fair. I think the story tags and underlying premise should provide a bit of a warning, but it takes long enough to get there that some readers felt assaulted and insulted by it. As always, thanks for reading!
Date: 02/02/20 08:04 am Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
To answer your question, a lot of the appeal of forcefem comes less out of the mechanical reality of it and more the vicarious experience of it. It would be absolutely horrifying in the real world to transition cis folk, but real world interactions aren't really the appeal of it all - it's written with an audience in mind who would be reading for that fantasy of it all.
I think that what rubbed me wrong and got that reaction from me us to have those dynamics played straight come crashing up against "well how would that interact in the real world" and coming out with some deeply nightmarish ideas of "you'll be detransitioned and stuck that way". It's almost the reverse of the appeal of forcefem - instead of "you'll get your desire without it being your fault for wanting it" you get "you'll be stuck the way you are/were no matter how much you've done"~ It mirrors the "you'll always be a man" hate rhetoric, albeit I am sure unintentionally. With a nuteral audience the plotline is mechanically sound and interesting, but with the presumed target audience it interacts poorly.
Like, I'm not trying to say you've done something really horrible here or w/e, just that this was personally upsetting to the point where I'm not really comfortable playing in the space anymore. I still like your previous work plenty~
Author's Response: Thank you for the clarification, and let me respond, in chief, by focusing on that last bit of verbiage, which I think is both astute and instructive: "playing in the space". Because that's exactly what I like to do. I take an idea, usually with some sort of kinky twist, but sometimes social issues, fears, or just weird 'what ifs' and really explore them in a story space. Anybody who's read my works knows I don't really do dark and disturbing dystopias, but neither do I provide an easy and sunny ride. To wit, the thing that's caused such a vehement and negative response - the notion that an illness could forcibly detransition a person - absolutely horrible, I think we'd all agree. That's why I don't dwell on it, but it's a pretty obvious ramification of the AHS. So... we've got a very bad thing here, but within it lies the kernel of something much better. Because whoever learns how to harness the power of the vehicle could use it for great good - putting people in the bodies they've always wanted, for instance. Or for horrific ill, such as forcibly transforming a whole population. That's something that I intend to continue writing about in the sequel to this... but that may not come to past now. Given the visceral and vehement negativity toward this story, I'm inclined not to post it here, and will have to consider which of my other stories should go here. In any case, thank you for your thorough and informative response - it's given me a lot to consider.
Date: 02/01/20 04:00 pm Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
Why. I had thought this would be an interesting read and wanted to wait until it was finished to go through. But hearing that you fucking went and decided "yeah the virus is based off of chromosomes, makes trans people detransition, and trans people go through conversion therapy and/or are fine because they get to be hot" hurts. It hurts so fucking much.
Did you not stop to think how that would affect people? Did you not stop to think how many trans people would be committing suicide? Did you not consider the mass graves?
Nah just one off hand paragraph acknowledging that.
I really liked On My Best Behavior. I did. That one was fun, it had affirming magic, it had rising against authority. But this? This hurts.
My friend Tessa once wrote a short story where a fascist group had a civil war in the US, and they were capturing trans people, and forcing them to detransition, giving trans women top surgery, testosterone injections, and shitty phalloplasties, and our pov character self combusts instead of getting mutiliated like that.
Hearing about your worldbuilding sent me into almost the same panic attack as that story did. And I get panic aftershocks just thinking of that story.
Author's Response: I'm sorry that you've found parts of this story triggering and, really, those disturbing parts of the illness are a very small part of the story. But, once I thought about a mechanism for the illness early on, I followed through on that thought, and the result is an illness with the potential to do horrible things to people, though it usually doesn't. To be clear, among the people who detransition who are mentioned (but not featured) in the story, they aren't fine because they're hot, but because they undergo the same kind of psychological changes our main character goes through that makes her mostly fine with her new body. Most people don't want to have their bodies forcibly changed by a mysterious disease, and if the idea of that happening (and its broader consequences) makes your skin crawl, then I'm sorry, and this isn't the story for you. I recommend that you skip this story - none of my other stories involve body-changing diseases.
Date: 02/01/20 03:41 pm Title: Chapter Six: Internet Famous
Yeah sorry, I have to nope out here. Usually your stuff is fun (if extremely smutty), but this one is getting really upsetting. Like, this chapter really takes it from "kinda fun kinky stuff" to "pretty horrifying". The casual use of a slur had me a bit on edge. But the reveal that trans folk get forcibly detransitioned and then either conversion-therapy'd or forcibly stuck pretransition, tossed off as casual world building? I'm sorry but I just can't fuck with that, it's too casually cruel.
Author's Response: I'm sorry if the mechanics of this story universe come across as horrifying to you. There are lots of horrifying illnesses in real life, too. Basically, once I thought through a way that the illness might work, I tried to extrapolate out to its logical conclusions. Those may be disturbing to some people, but I'm not sure how it's more disturbing than the thousands of other stories on this site that involve nonconsensual gender changes. Is there a fundamental difference that I'm missing? Or is it the fact that I've given this a semi-realistic treatment?
Date: 02/01/20 04:26 am Title: Chapter Ten: The Worst is Behind Us
I like the concept but I keep being taken out of it by how on-the-nose some of these plot points and characters are, and I feel like it's losing the kink aspect.
Author's Response: Many of my stories start with a kinky idea, but I only ever write just for kinks in my short stories - it's just not enjoyable for me to write long, kink-driven stories without a strong plot. However, if you let me know what kind of things you like to read in stories here, I can keep them in mind for future stories. Thanks for reading!
Date: 01/26/20 02:45 am Title: Chapter Nine: Famous For Real
That interview sounded... totally.forced.at.all
Felt hard to believe she had it together at that point and was able to be so composed. Also the final part, it totally didnt sound like she had completely accepted her new identity until now.
Felt a little forced, like we skipped some character progression. Suspension of desbelief and that.
Author's Response: Sorry if it came across as over-the-top. My intent was that Elle (who is, at this point, well above average, intelligence-wise) completely aced the interview and also had a fairly eye-opening revelation about herself in the process.
Date: 01/26/20 12:07 am Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
It was probably a combination of things - the genetic determination, the suicides, the mind control plot that felt similar to Flowers for Algernon. Somewhere along the line it stopped being fun and slipped into body horror.
Author's Response: I've hinted obliquely at some body horror, but there's absolutely none of it explicit here. Yes, there is some mental change stuff (Luke/Luci's storyline) that's pretty unconscionable and horrible. But almost all of the characters keep their wits about them and become remarkably attractive... certainly, the changes are unwelcome (at first), and it would be pretty frightening if a disease like this existed. But I suppose you and I will have to disagree as to what constitutes 'nightmare fuel' and 'body horror' (admittedly subjective), because neither was my intent, and I don't think it construes that way.
Date: 01/25/20 07:09 pm Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
You write well, I came to this after the magic school story and was skimming the sex scenes to see how things played out. But maybe I shouldn't have.
Author's Response: Perhaps not. I'm always eager to hear back from readers, whether they have good or bad things to say. Can you clarify what, specifically, made this bad? I don't want to dredge up anything you found triggering - as you say, you found it to be nightmare fuel. But I certainly didn't *intend* for any of this story to be horrific or deeply disturbing - and, indeed, most of the feedback I've gotten thus far hasn't suggested that it is. I'm not saying you're wrong - your opinion here is just as valid as any other - but I'm curious as to what you read and perceived that others did not, since it's something I may want to be mindful of in the future. I don't want you to feel compelled to divulge anything you don't want to, nor do I want to attempt to sway your mind. But I would like to know what I ought to have done differently to keep from alienating you as a reader.
Date: 01/25/20 04:40 pm Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
So I have to to admit, for any readers that might be on the fence after the description, that this setting is literally nightmare fuel. I didn't sleep well after reading it.
Author's Response: I'm sorry you didn't like it. Obviously, this is not intended to be a horror story - quite the opposite! This is supposed to be a kinky, sexy, fun tg story with a science fiction theme. But not every theme will sit well with everybody. Hopefully, I haven't misled with my description and categorization.
Date: 01/22/20 08:13 am Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
This is fun stuff but I gotta say inconsistencies in the characters views vs. the tone and actions taking place in the story are really coming to ahead. Like for example in this chapter where they save Lucy from sexual slavery by making her their sex slave and raping her instead.
Or was that the goal? If it's intentional I withdraw the complaint. I have no problem with erotic rape in and of itself, fetishes in text hurt no one. But it's just bugging me here that the narrative doesn't seem aware of what's going on.
Author's Response: Perhaps that's simply my oversight as an author. I meant to frame that scene as them being unusually horny teenagers who sort of stumbled into an orgy situation. The commands they gave Luci that triggered the orgy were obviously external commands, but none of their actions after that were intended to force her into a particular plan of action. It's worth asking whether Luci is capable of informed, enthusiastic consent at this point. If not, then it isn't possible to ethically have sex with her and what happened must be viewed as r***. But if she is, then I hope I portrayed her as an enthusiastic participant and not as a puppet who would have been otherwise unwilling. Because what I meant to portray was abnormally horny teenagers letting things get out of hand and *not* gang r*** of any sort.
Date: 01/17/20 03:45 am Title: Chapter Six: Internet Famous
Yup, as others have written, there's a whole lot going on here, but you're walking us through it in a very competent manner. I, at least, am enjoying the fantasy, and not feeling too lost either. "What if" this actually happened in the world -- yeah, a lot of it would probably unfold as you've "realistically" presented so far. I'm looking forward to more as the transformation completes and the adjustment continues.
Author's Response: Thanks for the input! I've tried to paint this story with a fairly realistic brush while keeping things fairly breezy. My plan is to pick up the pace of releases a bit and release the remaining six chapters at three chapters a week for the next two weeks. I hope you'll keep reading!
Date: 01/16/20 04:21 am Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
Pretty hot! Unfortunately, I am not a big fan of this particular kind of transformation.... such a shame. I was hoping for some kind of multiple form type or something with multiple personalities, something creative. Will probably still skim through though.
Author's Response: Sorry if this kind of transformation isn't up your alley. Though, El doesn't have a typical case, even for her unusual flavor, so it won't quite be what she expects. I hope you'll keep reading despite the story not hitting your preferred notes. Thanks for the feedback!
Date: 01/16/20 03:20 am Title: Chapter Six: Internet Famous
Ch 7 - Someone needs to help Lucy. This is very bad. Fascinating story, by the way. I love the way that you are compassionately exploring a tremendous number of issues in one story.
Author's Response: I'm glad you appreciate my coverage of multiple different topics in the story. It's definitely bad, and it would be great if a hero (or heroes) could bring it upon themselves to intercede! Thanks for reading!
Date: 01/13/20 11:13 am Title: Chapter Four: Home Again
I'm LOVING this story! An interesting concept and very well written. There are so many ways this story could unfold for Elias and the other characters - and I'm quite happy to be along for the ride. Thanks for posting!
Along the lines of an earlier comment, I'm wondering what AHS does to the pregnancy rate of the communities where it hits. And would the children born of those with AHS carry any of its characteristics forward?
Author's Response: I'm glad you love the story so far! What AHS does to pregnancy rate is a good question. Certainly, in the early stages of AHS, people have *way* more sex, and once it stabilizes they have substantially more (but usually not insane-o ten times a day sex), so the pregnancy rate will inevitably go up. While AHS doesn't directly affect either fertility or contraceptives (except, perhaps, for a handful of rare flavors), if AHS individuals aren't mindful of birth control or prophylactics and they have loads of sex with people who can get them pregnant / they can get pregnant, there's going to be a lot of pregnancy. Since AHS has an influence on genetics (but isn't entirely genetic), I imagine the offspring of AHS individuals have some trademarks of the syndrome and probably have low levels of the AHS vehicle in their bloodstream. Once they hit puberty, since they haven't actually got AHS, I'm going to say there's a chance for the AHS vehicle to randomly activate and give them the syndrome. Even if the chance is pretty low (say 0.1% per month), more than half of the children of people with AHS would eventually get the syndrome (t1/2 = 57.73 years) and, potentially, pass it on to other people.
Date: 01/12/20 12:35 pm Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
I remember becoming one of your patreons to read the rest of 'On best behaviour' because I couldn't wait for the free uploads and found this amazing story. I finished in one sitting it was great and well worth the patreon cost. I can't wait for you to do more with this story in the future, it has so much potential. Loving 'Aurelia' as well, even if I I'd prefer faster uploads to it; that just means I want more faster! Would recommend to anyone reading this to check Ovids pateron, its worth it. Good luck with your future chapters, loved them.
Author's Response: Thanks for being a Patron and thanks for your endorsement. Maybe one day I'll be able to devote myself to writing full-time... it works be nice. In the meanwhile, I have to pace myself to writing 'only' a novel every two months or so. C'est la vie! Thanks for the feedback and thanks for your support!
Date: 01/10/20 11:13 pm Title: Chapter Three: Team GB
Lol literally checked it as the new chapter dropped, love it and can't wait for more, hopefully lot's more but no pressure hehe
Author's Response: I'm glad you love it! This is a relatively short novel, but we're still less than 1/4 of the way done. I hope you'll keep reading!
Date: 01/08/20 03:35 pm Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
Ch 1 - Excellent start and interesting premise. And this is genius - "She smelled like horny wildflowers, if that made any sense."
Author's Response: I'm glad you like the story so far. And it's gratifying to see somebody appreciating my indulgence for fun little bits of description.
Date: 01/08/20 10:31 am Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
Somehow this story is only averaging 4 stars despite (now) having four 5-star reviews. Some idiot must have trashed it anonymously. I say idiot because this is shaping up to be one of the best stories on the site. Interesting and almost plausible plot and very well written. Please keep it up!
Author's Response: I'm glad you're enjoying it! I wonder whether somebody is annoyed at me because I ran into formatting issues (I've figured or what was going wrong). I'll keep it up, and I hope you'll keep reading!
Date: 01/05/20 01:00 pm Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
This is an interesting start, it pulls the reader in immediately and leave one wondering what might happen next. Hopefully, Elias and Melanie manage to avoid the IQ loss, that would be awful. I'm also curious to know if he got her pregnant.
Author's Response: You know, I think I intended for there to be a pregnancy thing when I started the story, and then I just sorta forgot about it. So don't get your hopes up for a pregnancy storyline. As for the IQ loss, I guess we'll have to see where things go... but (spoiler) for all of my longer stories, I like for my main characters to be pretty smart. Dumb main characters just can't get themselves into the same sorts of shenanigans.
Date: 01/05/20 06:47 am Title: Chapter One: Outbreak
Intrigued! Looking forward to more.
Author's Response: Glad you like it! I'll be releasing chapters to TGS every Wednesday and Sunday, so keep an eye out. There are 13 chapters in all, but Chapter 13 is a short one, so I'll probably release it with Chapter 12, or maybe a day after.