Date: 09/15/19 07:45 pm Title: Chapter 4 - To carry on
Gioe, thank you for writing out a story that is refreshing in its plot. There is a lot of repetition on these sites, your story stands out. Very creative. I'm especially curious to see how a 100% female population manages to procreate. Did the birds and bees also change when all the guys became girls? Can two girls make a baby? Do humans reproduce asexually - just split in half and move on? I can't wait to find out.
And I do consider lactating women very sexy, even if they were flat-chested men when they went to bed. So keep up the good work, don't let the negative reviews get you down. Some people aren't happy unless everyone else is miserable.
Date: 08/23/19 01:28 pm Title: Chapter 1 A normal day
Gioe, since story-tracking is currently broken, I popped in to check on the stories I was interested in. I see you haven't updated, and that's unfortunate. I hope you haven't been put off from writing by the savage ranting of a single troll.
If it makes you feel better, Headhunter and I both support your efforts. Starting to write is hard, because an author must bare their soul to their audience. My daughter is writing her first story right now, and it's really a pleasure to have the privilege of watching her spread her wings.
Anyway, I hope you're still going to write for us. I have no idea when story-tracking will be fixed, but hopefully it will be soon.
Date: 06/10/19 01:25 am Title: Chapter 4 - To carry on
Guys, how about if we offer a new and inexperienced author publishing his first story support, encouragement, and constructive criticism.
Berating him for failure to address the specifics of one or more of the 48 genders serves no purpose and instead makes this a hostile environment. Doesn't the Internet have enough hostile environments already? Why make this one too?
Date: 06/09/19 02:48 am Title: Chapter 1 A normal day
I agree with ZZCromosome, the ahem "review" left by Madeleine is more of a rant then anything, yes there are some points made there however the way it was said was so overly negative that is was almost disgusting to read, do keep in mind that the story is only up to chapter 4 so some of these points may or may not be address, there is a reason the magical change tag is there.
I would also like to point out that the Madeleine20XX account only has 1 review EVER, so here is a question to be ask, is this person just being plane old mad or a troll?
Date: 06/08/19 09:27 pm Title: Chapter 4 - To carry on
Madeline, your rant was unnecessarily hostile and vicious. Gioe made it quite clear that he's not a native speaker of English, nor the owner of a female body, so some of your criticisms are completely unwarranted.
Also, he's done a nice job of foreshadowing some answers to some of your questions. Clearly there's more going on here than we've seen so far. Currently, my theory is that the world has somehow shattered into parallel reality fragments that have different masculine/feminine characteristics. We'll see what Gioe decides to do. I personally am quite interested, so let's be supportive in the hope that he'll continue to share his art with us.
Also, Madeline, I would like to thank you for introducing me to a new word - 'cishetery' - which took me a while to figure out. Sorry to break the news to you, but cishetery people are approximately 96.5% of the population. So it's not a literary sin for a short story to allow that to set the tone for the story environment.
Author's Response: Thanks for your review and support ZZChromosome!
Date: 06/08/19 02:00 pm Title: Chapter 4 - To carry on
this whole story and premise is flawed. it is decent at best but it ignores a lot of things that make me want to fucking scream for the rest of eternity.
so first of i have to ask,why the fuck do you write your protag like he doesn't know what a woman's body is? do you not know how a woman's body works or are you trying to portray your mc as an idiot ? can you really not use another word for dick other then penis and willy ? like googling synonyms arent that hard dude, here let me help :phallus langer dork loom mickey pee-pee broomstick.
you dont need to use all of them but see, it aint that hard to look for synonyms, takes like 2 seconds
and this one is kinda personal to me, it will seem a bit nitpicky maybe but fuck me dude the cishetery of this story is mindblowing.
what the shit is gonna happen with trans girls, because boy that is a issue in and of itself. are they gonna get thanos snapped like the other ladies ? are they gonna get their dream bodies and live a happy life without having to go through hrt ? what about those that underwent all that and would look exactly like women ?
what about trans men? are they gonna count as woman and snap as well? what about those that are on t and where very happy about their body ? are they gonna turn into ladies and turn miserable as all shit because they are back in a womans body ?
Gosh Nonbinary people ? is that gonna be a fucking shroedingers cat style situation where they die and live at the same time ?
intersex people as well would suffer from this
so like, is there any thought put into that ? or did you just quickly grab them all up in a broom and shove them under the carpet in the hopes nobody thinks about this ? because i did and i wanna know the answers my dude.
this story MAY be able to be salvaged but fuck me you'd have to put a shit ton of effort into it because right now this is nothing but a jerkfest for dudes who dont know shit about girls and want something to beat their meat to real fast, the story sucks and can be replaced by a X-change caption of a hot girl. And even then, i have beaten my meat to far better stories then this.
-a very angery trans gal
Author's Response: Thanks for your review Mandeleine20XX, I've taken your criticism with much consideration and I'll try to improve on the points you made. So, about your questions; - ''why the f*** do you write your protag like he doesn't know what a woman's body is? do you not know how a woman's body works or are you trying to portray your mc as an idiot ?'' Probably I'm a idiot, idk. Not having a female body myself, I admit that I might have made some huge mistakes and I will be very glad if you could tell me some of them. On the other hand, I've also taken some creative liberties in describing the works of a female body, mostly because it isn't really a normal female body, even though it looks like one. - ''can you really not use another word for dick other then p**** and willy ?'' Sorry for that, I hadn't even noticed as I was translating it.Thanks for pointing it out. - ''what the s*** is gonna happen with trans girls, because boy that is a issue in and of itself. are they gonna get thanos snapped like the other ladies ? are they gonna get their dream bodies and live a happy life without having to go through hrt ? what about those that underwent all that and would look exactly like women ? what about trans men? are they gonna count as woman and snap as well? what about those that are on t and where very happy about their body ? are they gonna turn into ladies and turn miserable as all s*** because they are back in a womans body ? Gosh Nonbinary people ? is that gonna be a f****** shroedingers cat style situation where they die and live at the same time ?'' First of all, let me clarify; the females weren't just snaped out of existence, they didn't die, we are only seing a single point of view of all of this. Therefore, it was more like a reality rift than a Thanos type of snap, if you know what I mean. I will write more about it in the next chapters. Answering your questions; the tranformation revolved mainly around age and biological features. Sexuality and gender identity, on the other hand, remained intact, so, trans, nonbinary and cis / gay and straight persons were all afected acording to that. This will, of cource, raise many issues and conflictsin this new world(s). In the future, I will surely touch on these problems ''this story MAY be able to be salvaged but f*** me you'd have to put a s*** ton of effort into it because right now this is nothing but a jerkfest for dudes who dont know s*** about girls and want something to beat their meat to real fast, the story sucks and can be replaced by a X-change caption of a hot girl. And even then, i have beaten my meat to far better stories then this.'' - I agree with you, I started this story very poorly indeed, I think that it was mainly because of my inexperience and lack of practice on the english language. But I am slowly learning and getting better on my writing skills, so your critisism is very well welcomed. -gioe
Date: 05/18/19 08:13 pm Title: Chapter 3 Afternoon
Welp feels bad for all the girls under 18, just poof or something they either dont exist or gone somewhere. And now with everyone being a woman I guess they will have to resort to using sperm from storage and hope for a boy being born. And if that doesn't work then they better come up with a way for one woman to impregnate another before sperm count
Looking forward to reading more, keep up the hard work
Author's Response: Thanks for your review Headhunter. Hope you'll like the answers to those issues in the upcoming chapthers...