Date: 05/05/19 11:31 pm Title: Chapter 14 - Left Out
“Sorry, doll.” Alice made a beeline for the door. “You probably shouldn’t have trusted me,”
Yup, all these stories are like that. It's almost as thought the people who write them really, really hate women.
Anywhoo, let's see if this writer comes back or not. Personally, I think Connor needs to jump in front of a train, it will speed things up.
Date: 03/13/19 11:02 pm Title: Chapter 1 - A Visit from the Neighbors
I'm torn. On one hand, this is a very well-written story. On the other hand, it's so SADISTIC. It was fun at first, but now it's just kind of painful. Poor Connor. I really want to see these bitches (yes, I think that's an appropriate description for what they are) get what's coming to them, and I'm afraid it won't.
Date: 02/19/19 12:27 am Title: Chapter 14 - Left Out
Good story, Im definitely getting the never switching back vibe. Makes me sad that Conner is losing his mind, I hope you do a middle ground like where he keeps all his memory and original personality and accepts that he like being a woman more. Dont know if you need to change the tags around, I get the bisexual one but the attractive to woman one kinda become irrelevant when she starts doing blow jobs and crave cocks. Also the is just my personal opinion but I prefer the lesbians play and hope that at the end of the story conner and a woman that like conner for for who s/he is end up in loving relationship but it's your story so only you get to decide that. Hope this review helps even if it didn't
Date: 09/13/18 01:29 pm Title: Chapter 14 - Left Out
The slow torture of Connor is really well done. I'm think that Alice and Maria have no intention of giving him his life or body back. I wonder when Connor will figure that out? When he does, what will he do? Suicide? Or will the magic have changed him so much he accepts life as a girl? If it's the second part, then I hope he at least breaks away from Maria . . . maybe moves in with his sister? I also hope that Maria and Alice get a little karma. After all, from what Connor's sister said, they'll be punished when they break the contract and steal his life. Of course, I could be wrong and he'll get switched back . . . but I don't think I am.
Date: 09/13/18 12:16 pm Title: Chapter 14 - Left Out
I know that I'm really enjoying a story when I feel trepidation clicking into a new chapter because I'm worried about what might happen to the main character. I think it's been a year or two since I've felt that way (since "Potential" by Pan over on MCStories, which didn't end the way I hoped) so you're doing a great job. The writing is top notch.
I agree with some of the other posters that things seem to have taken a darker turn. Since Connor picked up the ability to read magic a bit, it's felt to me like Maria would in some way be kept from turning him back on Tuesday - hit by a bus or something else outside her control. But I'm hoping that's not the case. Connor may have been a bit cocky but it's clear that whatever is left of Alice's regular personality in the male body is making new-Connor an even worse person.
The only thing that has me confused a bit is why it seems that Connor is so bad at being Alice, even when he's not fighting the parts of her skills and personality that he's been given. Was she just bad at life previously? We didn't see that much of her past but it seemed early on that normal Alice was much more put together than Connor-Alice is - whereas Alice-Connor is kicking ass.
Anyway, thanks so much for writing this as it's been a great rollercoaster. Just hoping it all goes back to normal for our hero on Tuesday!
Author's Response: Thanks so much for all the gracious words! Yes, It is hard at times to balance between keeping Connor on his toes, and thrust unwittingly into sexual encounters while keeping it light. There are twists and turns still to come so don't worry too much. As far as why Connor is struggling to cope while Alice is doing great I think it's a couple things. The big one was explained by Maria. When she did the femininity/masculinity swap the spell worked too well creating unnatural ratios between these two forces. Alice ended up getting way too much masculinity concentrated into one place along with all the dominance, confidence and self-assuredness you would expect from such a situation. Connor on the other hand got just the opposite, hence his rampant emotions and inability to take charge. He also is in a naturally less powerful position than he is used to and is "left in the dark" compared to the other players in the story. As things go on and he adapts perhaps he'll start learning how to use what he has to his advantage.
Date: 09/13/18 07:45 am Title: Chapter 14 - Left Out
So, I specifically created an account just to comment on your story, if that is any indication of how invested I am. Your writing is very good and manages to captivate the reader's interest. Your spelling and grammar is extremly good and the story flows very well. You manage to make an almost impossible to relate situation as "realistic" as possible - and I think that is a high compliment to pay when writing in this subject matter.
However, the reason I'm writing this is, that in the last couple of chapters -especially considering last two spells (robbing the mc of his memories and "adjusting" his sexuality) and the enterity of chapter 14 - the story is veering dangerously close to mind break/rape territory.
Now, I like the humiliation play and the "dominant to submissive" trope as much as the next guy/girl here - in fact Maria's orgasm denial and teasing are some of my favorite parts of this story. But more and more, this is losing the aspect of free will and a consenting mc (even if somewhat reluctant), which definitly takes the story down a much darker turn. I considered the way it was made clear that there were rules and that Maria seemed to truly care about the MC's well being in her own mischivous way very important - some of my favorite scenes in this story are about Maira showing her soft side and empathizing with the mc or consoling him.
But in my opinion, this aspect of her character is severly undermined by the way she keeps using spells. Again, I do not mind her dominating the mc, the sexual teasing and her using magic in a fun way. And I appreciate the finer points of a forshadowed conflict of interest with the newly empowered Alice in the future, but the recent developments and especially Alice behaviour in chapter 14 can planly be called emotional, sexual and psychological abuse and it made me sort of uncomfortable. More so, considering how invested I am in this story at this point.
Now, if this way always the way you intended to go with your story, please ignore my comments. I just wanted to give you a reader's perspective, in case this was not exactly the way things were meant to be percieved. Either way, you are a talented writer and I look forward to more of your writing and (hopefully) more emotional comfort for the mc down the line.
Author's Response: I do like a little bit of edgy darkness in my stories, but nothing too intense. It can be a hard balance to strike sometimes without letting things get boring.
Date: 09/13/18 05:54 am Title: Chapter 14 - Left Out
I liked how this started, but lately the antagonists have been way too over the top. Conner was supposedly cocky, but there is no way he was worse than Alice, Maria, or his sister. They are being cruel for the sake of being cruel.
I’m afraid for how this story is going to end. If it ends the way I think it will end, it’s going to be a super downer.
I am sticking with it to see how it ends but would like Conner/Alice to catch a break once.
Date: 09/13/18 02:49 am Title: Chapter 14 - Left Out
I highly doubt that old Alice will ever let old Connor get his body back. And she isn’t a signatory on the contract, so she isn’t bound to cooperate. Maria is just playing, and will likely honor the deal, but Alice likes the new life too much. Without the spell book...
Date: 09/13/18 02:03 am Title: Chapter 14 - Left Out
Oh I kinda wanted the spell to be a physical one, like BE. Maybe the next one? Also it was never revealed how did she find out? I was hoping he would be compelled to say the truth, that would have been hot I think.
Regarding the current storyline, pretty good, keep going. I am still rooting for them switching back in the end though, the whole 'work and skills' stealing feels ok in shorter stories but its really hard to justify in longer stories where you get to know and feel the characters. Or maybe, as a twist, they get their indentities and stuff back, but not their bodies! So he ends up a female CIO, etc. Dunno, ideas.
Author's Response: How did Maria find out that Connor spoke to his sister you mean? I mentioned that Maria had a "charm" on the spell that somehow informed her when the contract was broken. I did kind of gloss over those details though...
Date: 09/11/18 05:47 am Title: Chapter 1 - A Visit from the Neighbors
Just read thru all the chapters - I have to say I absolutely love your style! I also really enjoy the cruelty Maria and her beau are dishing out, personally. I mean if you're a witch why would you want to pass up this amazing opportunity right? Plus the hot-shot cocky guy who is like the same age as you and owns your building can def use just about any amount of humiliation.
Really love how you manage to keep upping the stakes without things really getting out of hand, and how you manage to keep all of your characters motivations and responses in line and believable. Really really great stuff!
Date: 09/11/18 03:13 am Title: Chapter 13 - Realization and Compromise
Another interesting chapter, I've gotta say, your character development for Connor is superb! I do wonder, why are Maria and Alice being so cruel? It seems misplaced . . . but I can't wait to see what happens next.
Date: 08/29/18 03:45 pm Title: Chapter 1 - A Visit from the Neighbors
Okay, you got me checking posted stories everyday waiting for the next episode. I am hooked on the erotic elements of this story. But, I would love to see a little dark side pop up with the foreshadowing of the "fun little spell" upcoming because Conner broke the rules of the contract.
Maybe a slight amnesia of his former male life enabled by the fact that Jared has really been secretly directing and guiding Maria with 'suggestions of spells' in order to gain control of the profitable company with Alice out of the way. Of Course it would take Jared to reveal that the real Alice has been boinking Diego behind her back and breaking her trust to get her out of the way.
And a little spell dose of 'sexual reorientation' to Conner would seal the deal for not caring about missing the reversal and enduring the six and half year wait. Oh well, so many possible twists.
Date: 08/17/18 11:34 pm Title: Chapter 10 - A Very Different Career
An interesting twist on the story with Alice meeting up with her 'friend with benefits' .
Seems like New Conner is enjoying life too much to actually switch back, despite the 'contract'.
Can't wait to see how Conner's sister reacts to New Alice's predicament.
Keep up the great writing.
Date: 07/28/18 03:20 pm Title: Chapter 9 - Something Gained for What Was Lost
I really love this chapter. I like how Connor is fighting back and the hints that he is going to end up stuck. On the one hand, I want Alice and Maria to be above the board and have no plan to steal Connor's life and body. On the other hand, with all the hinting, I think they are planning to steal his life. It makes me wonder if he doesn't try something and mess up his own chance to get his life back?
Author's Response: Thanks for all the great feedback and reviews! I actually read some of your stories quite a while back and have enjoyed them so much! I think one of the first stories like this that I read was Medallion Comes to Fairview several years ago on fictionmani.tv.
Date: 07/28/18 02:53 pm Title: Chapter 7 - A Spec of Revenge
I love how Connor is on an emotional roller coaster. Not a good idea to get wasted and then start snapping nude pics . . . I bet that comes back to haunt him. If he wasn't so wasted he'd be a bit alarmed by Maria's steady story line that they're going to stay swapped for a few days. Nice bit of foreshadowing there.
Date: 07/03/18 09:56 am Title: Chapter 1 - A Visit from the Neighbors
It feels like the word 'amazing' doesn't quite do this story justice. I'm instantly in love.
I have a specific genre of TG fiction that I prefer; 'explicit,' 'tricked,' 'stuck,' 'female domination,' 'fights change'... but the likelihood of hitting ALL of my favorite buttons at once - while still seeming fresh, and well-written - seems to get smaller every year. But this was/is an instant classic.
This story is fantastic. I love the feeling of helplessness combined with reluctant enjoyment that I - and the main character - feel with each step further down the rabbit hole. The descriptions of mental transformation are terrifying and erotic and... just great. I'm really looking forward to seeing this story finished, and I immediately saved you as a 'favorite' author. I can't wait to see what comes next, and I can't wait to see what other stories you might be cooking.
Date: 06/28/18 08:50 pm Title: Chapter 9 - Something Gained for What Was Lost
The mental transformation in this story is truly great. My favorite part is Connor's internal struggle to resist the curse--how he can recall his old life if he concentrates hard enough, but that otherwise Alice's personality takes over. That came out in earlier chapters but you really nailed it in this one.
Date: 06/22/18 12:15 am Title: Chapter 1 - A Visit from the Neighbors
Well done! Has me anticipating the next chapter.
I love the theme of helplessness, domination, and mysterious feminization with magical influences.
There is a nice erotic background of playful experimentation, anger, resignation, new hormonal
arousal, and the final realization that there might be a mental transformation into a bimbo trapped in the fog of diminished intelligence. Fun read! now my best favorite story that was Conchita the maid swapping places with the powerful CEO Male and loving it.
Date: 06/21/18 02:27 pm Title: Chapter 8 - An Exchange of Responsibilities
Looks like Maria has an agenda she isn't sharing. And what about Alice? Is she ever going to agree to change back? I have the nasty suspicion, that Connor will be stuck as Marias sex toy for a while.
Date: 06/21/18 07:38 am Title: Chapter 1 - A Visit from the Neighbors
You know, I find it curious that two stories (this and 'Ill make you happy') with similiar thematics (guy and girl swap bodies, the personalities, then roles and intelligence) are being published at the same time, very interesting! I find these kinds of stories very thriling, but I am always dissapointed at the end when the authors decide to make it permanent. Like, whats the point of having new experiences if you have to leave everything that makes you 'yourself' behind?
But anyways, thats my take. Your writing has real quality. Keep going!
Date: 05/09/18 07:23 pm Title: Chapter 3 - Waking Up on the Other Side
This idea of the swapping femininity/masculinity is great! It reminds me of the wonderful "Student Transfer".
I guess they'll continue to change into each other till Connor loses his identity.
Can't wait to read further!
Date: 05/04/18 12:59 pm Title: Chapter 4 - Texting Troubles, Shower Bubbles
Great chapter. Well written. I like the subtle submissiveness of Alice. I think I missed the little voice and what it is saying inside Alice's head.
I suspect the real Alice will invite Jared along on the outing. Question will they tell Jared about the mind transfer? Either way I think Jared would hit on the new Alice. Even his old body will be trying to get into her panties. Maria will be about to make sure she remains demure to them and to her. Just some speculations.
Author's Response: Thanks for the review! Your accuracy of speculations will be revealed soon :)
Date: 05/04/18 06:47 am Title: Chapter 1 - A Visit from the Neighbors
Really enjoying this so far - it's well-written and I like where the story is headed.
Hopefully Maria inflicts more unwanted changes on them!
Author's Response: There are still a few surprise changes to come! Thanks for the review :)
Date: 05/02/18 11:39 am Title: Chapter 3 - Waking Up on the Other Side
Well written and interesting twist on some classic plot hooks. That said, I really feel like Connor is carrying the idiot ball here. Maybe it’s desperation, but getting tricked once and now he’s getting in deeper.
The smart thing would probably be to take his ball and go home, just bailing on them. That doesn’t look like the dynamic though — for all of his success, Connor doesn’t seem to have the self confidence to be unmoved. Maria will just keep playing games with her new toy — perhaps not maliciously, but that doesn’t change the fate of the mouse when the cat’s about. Too bad there’s no friendly best friend who also is looking for an opportunity who could rescue “Alice” — oh wait there is EXACTLY that. That path avoids magic at the cost of becoming Alice in function as well as form.
Looking forward to where you take it — thanks for sharing.