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Reviewer: JRRudd Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/15/18 10:21 pm Title: Choose your character

I think the story has potential. It certainly is unique to read/do an interactive project.

Reviewer: FutureHope Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/15/18 12:31 am Title: Choose your character

This was fantastic! I really liked the create-your-own-story idea. I'd LOVE to see more with more detailed and mature TG themes!

Reviewer: 930310 Signed Report
Date: 02/12/18 07:27 pm Title: Chapter 3

You need to fix the grammar.

Reviewer: M A Thermidor Signed Report
Date: 02/12/18 03:31 pm Title: Choose your character

I do like what you've done. Although please don't shove all the dialogue into a single line. It makes it confusing as to who is speaking.

TGS was never really designed for interactive fiction. While you've done a decent job, if you want to up your level then I suggest looking into an easy to use program called Twine that was built for stories like these.

Reviewer: Trismegistus Shandy Signed Report
Date: 02/12/18 07:50 am Title: Chapter 19

I like what you've got here, but it feels like the possibilities aren't explored thoroughly enough, and the different branches don't diverge enough. For the most part, we're experiencing the same events from different points of view; the choices don't matter as much as they should in a story like this. And after the transformation is over, the story is over a couple of hundred words later. I'd like to see you explore the form in a longer, more complex story, maybe with fewer viewpoint characters, but where the reader's choices have a bigger impact on the story, and they have meaningful choices to make after their transformation. I look forward to seeing more your work.

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TG Storytime uses the eFiction engine and Vanilla discussions. Design by J6P.