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Reviewer: Will It Work Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 05/01/18 11:09 am Title: Chapter 12 - The Best Laid Plans

I don’t hate you. For me, it’s less about how “happy” a conclusion is, and more about how well it’s earned. Having a horror story where the monster wins and everyone else dies (a personality death) is a valid — and expected — end to this story. The major issue I have is the abrupt perspective change from Anna to Mary.

It might be interesting having a “what happens after he dies” ending — maybe an investigator on the grounds. Maybe a one-shot sequel? Did Elliot do a Mad Father and take his family and start again? How much do the ghosts of that manor scream? With the Warden’s death, what happens to everyone? (Revert, re-fixate, or just go catatonic? Of course, it’d be unlikely said investigator would make it out… intact…

Any way it goes, or if you leave it here, thanks for sharing. A frightening and very readable story.

Author's Response: Wowee! First off, I have no intention of directly leaving it here. There will at least be SOME more to the story, although because this story is purely just a "lets sit down to write and see where it goes" story, I have no comittement to any sort of update consistency. But expect more, at least a little. All of that being said, having a one-shot story about an investigator walking through the place seems pretty dang cool and I might do that if I ever get around to it. Half the time I sit down to write this story I have 0% of a plan for what I'm gonna write, but I think I do have at least half of an ending in my head as of this moment. I'm probably gonna step away from this one for a bit, as throwing such a huge perspective shift tends to make me wanna take a step back (even when it feels right at the time), but maybe in a few weeks/month I'll finish it up. As far as the initial perspective shift from Anna to Mary, I felt I couldn't best describe the changes in Anna from her own perspective, and thought staying there would lose that feeling of being trapped and stuff (Or at least for a while until she was more properly established). It also probably came from me not knowing exactly what to do with her either (aka it was a cop out), but ya... I did want to come back to her though, just because once I got a better handle on her character I just thought it'd be interesting. Also, idk if you can tell, but when I run out of ideas for a character's usefullness I tend to just kill them off (cough Ellie and Chase! cough). It's probably a bad habit, but again, I don't so much care in this story like I would in others. So ya, glad you like it through all of its not-thought-outness and its often super weird and wacky turns. Thanks!

Reviewer: storylovinggamer Signed Report
Date: 04/25/18 04:24 am Title: Chapter 11 - Practice Makes...

I want this evil bastard incinerated. Don't give this a bad ending.

Author's Response: Hehehe, okay. I'll make sure its a happy ending. And saying that you want him incinerated makes me actually wonder if I can come up with a way that incineration is pheasable to the plot.

Reviewer: Fuskybusky Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/24/18 01:10 pm Title: Chapter 11 - Practice Makes...

Come on. Please don't end this on a sad note!

Reviewer: Lady Yuki Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/24/18 11:28 am Title: Chapter 11 - Practice Makes...

Please give us a win. I like a tragic ending sometimes, but that just doesn't feel right for this one.

Reviewer: Lady Yuki Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/20/18 11:58 pm Title: Chapter 1 - The Shock

I was really intrigued by this story when it stared and I'm very happy that it seems to be back. Please continue if you are able.

Reviewer: Literrexs Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/20/18 07:21 pm Title: Chapter 8 - Perfect

I like the story so far I wanna see where it goes buddy

Reviewer: Fuskybusky Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/19/18 04:05 pm Title: Chapter 8 - Perfect

Please continue this story!

Reviewer: Mr5yy Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 08/30/17 04:51 am Title: Chapter 7 - All Is Lost

Wow, this is intense.

Reviewer: storylovinggamer Signed starstarstar Report
Date: 08/30/17 04:34 am Title: Chapter 7 - All Is Lost

Okay... This is getting extreme.... Time for escape.

Reviewer: storylovinggamer Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 08/27/17 03:45 pm Title: Chapter 5 - End It

Wow that was creepy! I look forward to more soon!

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