Date: 10/17/12 05:16 pm Title: Chapter 1
You sure aren’t a very nice person. If you have so much negativity, why don’t you send the author a email? She is one of the few that actually have their contact information on each story.
I understand that these comments are for everyone’s opinions but I don’t see any of your stories for us to read or am I mistaking?
Anyway, that’s my little opinion. Another thought for you Snarfles is that you change your name to sniffles. You seem to whine a lot when I looked at your other posts for the different authors you posted your comments on. I hope you have some nice things to say. I do agree with some of your comments and this author does need to take more time proof reading but it's free to read so I don’t complain too much.
If you disagree with my thoughts send me a email and I will respond. I'm sharing my thoughts because I enjoy reading this authors stories.
Date: 06/22/12 08:10 pm Title: Chapter 1
I have a suggestion for you PPB. Write your stories using a word type program....Open Office is a wonderful business suite distributed free by Sun.com. Proofread your work and make corrections. Proofread it again. DON'T trust spellcheck to edit your stories for you. DON'T trust a grammar checker to make your decisions for you. These things are tools to make it easier, but not to do the thinking for you. Then, when it tells the story you want it to tell, copy paste the whole thing onto the website.
Work on your paragraph structures. When a character "speaks" it is the beginning of a new paragraph. Changing speakers starts another paragraph.
Be aware of redundancies, You don't need to describe the same pair of frilly pink diaper covers three times, back to back. ie: 'Mommy found a pair of my little sisters baby panties, pink satin with rows and rows of frilly white lace. The plastic crinkled loudly in my ears as she slid them up my legs; the elastic leg openings firmly encircling my limbs. The waistband snapped into place, encasing my bulky diaper. The lace trim tickled where it brushed my skin; and I feared I would never see my penis again.'
I have read your posted work, and I must say they are hard to distinguish. The differences are superficial and superfluous. You may want to develop a bit more character depth, give your readers more of 'why' to accompany the 'what'. I'd really like to know why 'mommy' wants to make her son into a little girl.
Snarfles thinks you could be an awesome writer, but you have to want it sweetie.
Date: 05/17/12 07:32 am Title: Chapter 1
Wow, a bit of a change from previous stories but I really like the content. If Stevie turns out to be Bi and likes what he finds down below with Kellie then who knows where the tale could go!!!
Author's Response: Thanks katt I wanted this to turn adult-ish that is why I threw that twist. Had lots of fun writing this short story. There's a blend of real life action from my past and some that I wanted to happen. Thanks again Hun, Princess panty boy