Date: 10/08/19 06:04 am Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
That was a lot of fun! The writing was really good, though it could use a good editor. I was not happy with Bobby’s betrayal of Scott — not the way a friend should treat you.
Thanks for sharing!
Author's Response: Glad you enjoyed it. I appreciate the review. Thanks for reading xx
Date: 05/05/19 07:17 pm Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
"I understand the big twist when Bobby pinned Scott down and changed him into a girl forever was a bit of a shock for some readers. " It kinda was and kinda wasn't. Someone always pulls a total douche-bag move in these kinds of stories and the only likable character in the entire story gets royally betrayed. That being said, Bobby is a scumbag and I enjoyed your story.
Author's Response: Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it and understand why I took it in that direction. I write a lot of stories where the good guys have a nice, sweet ending but this wasn't one of those stories. Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 01/11/19 02:38 am Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
Great story! Magical changes are my favorite. Of those, forced feminization are the best. A surprising twist at the end, as long as everyone is happy with the results. I love your writing style, your level of detail is perfect. Moral of the story: don't mess with witches.
Author's Response: He-he, I'm glad you enjoyed it. Also: Don't always trust your friends! I'm glad you enjoyed the twist and the story overall. I see your reading through most of my stories so I thank you for your continuing support. Love Adam xx
Date: 05/06/18 10:17 pm Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
A depressing ending, but it was bold of you to go through with it. Most authors shy away from "bad" endings. I do wonder, though, whether Bobby's life was re-written by the magic as well. Does he remember the curse and forcing his friend into this life, or has the former Scott always been his female friend, Scarlett, in his mind? If so, I guess it's not much of a curse... Though even if that's the case, Bobby's personality would still be the same; he'd still be a selfish asshole deep down inside. I also hate to think of how he might treat Scarlett in the future (jealous and possessive, I'd assume) -- and how terrible it will be for her once she realizes that her boyfriend and long-time pal is such a bastard.
Though if it's bad enough...I suppose the witches might decide to curse him a second time. ;)
Author's Response: Hi, Thanks for reviewing. I never saw the ending as depressing really, more ironic. The whole story was meant to be a somewhat comedic farse though I suppose it is horrific when you get down to the reality of it all. The story was inspired by TG captions which if you've read a few always have a somewhat humorous yet messy end for the protagonist. You're not the first to say the ending was depressing though, so I get it. The way I saw it, the magic that took effect at midnight changed reality not only for Scott but everyone else. Therefore Bobby believes scarlet has always been a female. He will probably treat her well to begin with as he is punching above his weight with her but in the end a** holes are always exposed for what they are ;-) Thanks for reading. I hope you continue to enjoy my work. x
Date: 04/05/18 04:10 am Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
This went exactly as I had expected it to go, in every way... until the end. I didn't expect Bobby to betray him in the end, but I still didn't expect Scott to go back to normal. I just thought it would take Bobby too long to *ahem* climax. It was still very fun to read though! The twist helped! But I must admit, I do wish that Bobby would have remembered everything, as the punishment was so that they would know. I feel that he got off easy as he doesn't remember what he had to do, not to mention, he has no guilt about betraying his best friend. I hope to see you back here soon!
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. The twist was a risky end to the story and originally it was planned as you said. He was going to take too long to*ahem* climax. I'm glad you enjoyed it though and I understand your thoughts about Bobby missing out on some kind of punishment. I guess It didn't seem necessary to me as it was a very confusing happy ending. Thanks for reading and reviewing. I am currently working on another story called 'The Female Me' which you may enjoy. xx
Date: 01/26/18 06:35 am Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
I forgot to comment on the ending - I'm personally not a fan of identity death. Still, I loved the story, though not particularly the ending - I do wonder what I'd done as Scarlett/Scott - I hope taking a big cock in my pussy at exactly 12:01! I would've been his mirror image, not really trying to get laid, but wanting to, before midnight.
Author's Response: Hi, thanks for commenting. The ending was a bit controversial I admit. Originally the ending was going to be how you described however. Scott was going to end up loving the sex so much he didn't realize the clock hit 12:01 but I decided to add a twist at the end that I thought would be more shocking. Worked for some, not for others. If you like you can imagine your own ending. There was always 2 in my mind ;-) Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 01/24/17 03:07 am Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
I love a happy ending. Nice job...well written. I liked the ending...you kept us in suspense right up to midnight deadline. Obviously it could have ended many different ways, but I think you did it well.
Author's Response: Thanks! Glad you enjoyed the ending, it did receive mixed reviews but I think it fit well as well. Thanks for reading and reviewing. xx
Date: 01/16/17 10:28 pm Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
Wow... he gets away with it. And the "witches" have the nerve to just laugh about this? How could anyone consider this a good ending for Scott? Scott is gone, brainwashed into becoming that monsters girlfriend. Anyone that would do this, deserves to die, plain and simple. I kinda hope Scarlett realizes what a piece of utter garbage Bobby is later on and dumps him for a better man. A man who actually has a soul and cares about others other than his worthless self. I hope she'll realize it before it's too late just what utter human trash Bobby is.
Author's Response: Yeah it's not a traditional happy ending for poor Scott but I'm sure he will find happiness in his new life. Bobby will get whats coming to him eventually, bad guys like him always do. Scarlet will see through him I'm guessing. Maybe the witches will get revenge on behalf of Scott. I will leave what happens after to your imagination. Thanks for reading and reviewing. xx
Date: 01/15/17 07:23 pm Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
I really enjoyed the story, but I kinda didn't like your choice to have the betrayal. I feel like Scott never got to enjoy being a girl but rather he was forced into the role, literally pinned and made to change... then the one being selfish and making him change got his happy ending afterwards..
That being said, I enjoyed reading it, at least until that point, the writing was fine.. just not my preference in theme :)
Keep up the good work though!
Author's Response: Hi Alisha, Thanks for the detailed and honest review. I understand the ending wasn't to everyone's tastes. The bad guy wins but I never meant for this to be a horrific kind of ending. I saw it as more of a tongue in cheek, ironic kind of climax. Either way I appreciate the 5 stars and your kind words. Thanks for reading and reviewing. xx
Date: 05/22/16 05:12 am Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
Oh my god. I was expecting Bobby to fuck Scott over, because that's just where my head always turns to as a writer, but I didn't think you would ACTUALLY do it! Holy fuck, Bobby is a bastard.
Author's Response: he-he thanks.yeah it was a risky plot twist and a few readers didn't like it but it was worth it. Glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 03/03/16 06:16 am Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
Thank you for the Story, You will be missed until you can get to writing again.I might just have to reread Summer holiday again while i wait.
Author's Response: Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it. It makes writing these stories all the more worth it. It'll be a long break I think but hopefully you'll be hearing from me again at some point this year. Until then thanks for reading. xx
Date: 03/02/16 06:57 am Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
Very nice plot, and I enjoyed the writing style. The reason, however, that it has not received 5 stars is the ending. The whole story was great, but I (like many of the reviewers) did not like the ending. To echo at least one other - it felt 'forced'. I was half expecting (and half hoping) that Scarlet would turn back, but then ask the witches to turn her fe!ale again, as she had more fun that way.
But again, well written, and I will keep up with your future stories
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. Sorry to hear you didn't like the ending. It was a tricky one to wrap up and I think everyone has their own idea about what should of happened. I'm glad you enjoyed the plot and my writing style though and I appreciate the 4 stars and the comments. Thanks for reading I hope you enjoy my future work. xx
Date: 02/29/16 01:31 pm Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
This was a decent, well-written story with some good descriptive elements common to this genre. The major problems were with pacing and the ending. There was an immediate sense of urgency after the curse initiated that seemed to go away and slow the story down until the final chapters.
As for the ending, identity death is very hard to do and have it be satisfying for the reader, especially for the protagonist of a 1st person POV story. In this story, it fails because a) it erased purpose for the curse in the first place, b) it also gave Bobby's betrayal (which unlike your other readers I liked) no meaning, c) it didn't feel much like a tragedy or happy ending or even bittersweet, just not thought out. The witches might as well have just killed the boys right out instead of putting them through a game that essentially did the same thing anyway. The other way you could have gone is for the two boys to realize feelings for each other at the curse's completion (either real or forced upon them by the curse) and spin it into a sense of backfire justice on the witches that they gave the boys utter happiness. It kinda felt like that except the ID death robbed the reader of the feelings the character's shared.
A decent tale overall and I wish you success in your future work.
Author's Response: Hi, Thanks for the detailed review. I understand from the mixed feedback I've been getting that the twist and ending is not to everyone's taste but some found it very enjoyable also. I'm sorry you thought it went in the wrong direction and just shows it's hard to satisfy everyone. I understand what you're saying about the story but I never looked upon the ending as harshly as calling it an 'identity death', though i respect your opinion. There were many different ways to end the story and I did contemplate similar ideas to the ones you described. I just thought this ending fitted best and was a fun, ironic twist at the end. After all I never intended the story to be anything meaningful though I think it's great you did get attached to scott's journey and cared what happened to him. I have learned a lot from writing this story and feel it has been valuable to help me grow as a writer so I thank you for your feedback. I'm glad you liked my writing as a whole and I appreciate your kind words. Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy my future work more. xxx
Date: 02/29/16 08:02 am Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
Your story started well and it was well written for the most part. You are a good writer and I only read if off the strength of your wonderful Summer Holiday.
I hated the ending. It felt wrong in the moral sense and wrong as the final chapter in the sense it didnt seem to fit. Ruined the whole story for me. So disappointed. The sense of injustice was just too much for me. I can't stand these sorts of endings where the nice guy gets screwed and the horrible guy gets the happy ending for no real reason. Essentially the nice guy dies and no one cares. Death of personality is practically death of person. Sure it may be a happy ending for Scarlet, but its not a happy ending for the reader who knows better. Even being stuck in a girls body with your memories intact is better than that horrible end.
The witches were a decent enough plot device to start with, but in the last chapter it was silly in the sense they wanted to punish the guys and didn't seem concerned at all they wiped someone from existence and one guy wasn't punished at all and neither remembered their punishment so it was if there was never any punishment in the first place. What was the point in the first place? It just doesn't seem to work as part of the plot. I would see them being mad with the result and trying to make sure Bobby is punished and at least let Scott have his memories back through a loophole given that they remember the old Scott and let him choose his path. I feel that would be a more consistent way for them to act.
The two main characters were developed enough for the most part, but their actions were inconsistent. I dont see how an attractive Scarlet would be best friends with a loser like Bobby. How could the two be best friends if Scott/Scarlet didnt know Bobby was a sociopath. Only a sociopath would murder a friend, which is exactly what happened no matter how the character can try and justify it. That again doesn't seem consistent to me unless Scott was a clueless idiot which he didn't appear to be.
I understand you wanted to take a risk in your writing, but I don't see what the payoff was meant to be from that risk. It just didn't work for me. But I guess you can't please everyone.
Good luck with your new job and thank-you for all your stories!
Author's Response: Hi, Thanks for the long, detailed review. I'm sorry you didn't like the ending. Endings are hard to write as they do not always please everyone as you say. I can see from the feedback people are divided on this one and there are positive and negative opinions. I guess your dislike for 'the bad guy winning' kind of ending is just a matter of taste but I respect your opinion. I never intended for the story to be a meaningful journey where the readers would care about Scott's fate though it's great that you did care. I guess that is my error. The story was meant to have the tone of a wacky comedy in a sense. The witches were meant to be a bit cartoony in the way they were portrayed. Messing around with magic and revenge and not caring deeply about what happened to the poor victims. Scott and Bobby were mismatched friends, which was deliberate so they could play off each other. Scott was the serious one and Bobby was the nutty one who would get Scott into all kinds of trouble. I thought they clashed well and gave their friendship something different. Scott pays dearly in the end for his friendship with Bobby and that's just the final ironic twist. The story as a whole was meant to be a piece of fun fiction with twists and turns a long the way. I thought a rather dark and Ironic ending would be the best way to finish it and for some it was satisfying and for others it wasn't. Thanks anyway for reading and I'm glad you enjoyed 'The summer Holiday'. I hope you enjoy more of my work in future. Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 02/29/16 05:07 am Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
The twist is brilliant. I'm seriously jealous I didn't think of that first for one of my stories. You built it right into all of the characters throughout - Bobby was always the selfish and self-centered one, which also worked out for him in getting changed too. Well drawn characters, it was practically the only choice you had if you wanted it to be something awesome. Keep it up and thank you for writing something so great.
Author's Response: Thanks for the kind words Ezra. I agree the twist did give the story some POW or what ever you want to call it. Sadly there has been some negative responses to it though. Anyways I'm glad you enjoyed it and the story. Thanks for reading! xx
Date: 02/28/16 10:47 am Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
Overall it is still a fun reading. In my opinion it is a nice ending for Scott in his new reality as Scarlett. What I would suggest is the original Scarlett and Bobby both split into their own new reality, with Scarlet reality is how your ending is now. The original Bobby should keep his old memories in his own new reality, but he will not be able to keep Scarlet as his girlfriend like what he has intended because the new Scarlet is a different person and only make use of him after that sex. Maybe that could be a better ending. I still like your story though so cheers. ;)
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. I'm glad you enjoyed the ending and thanks for sharing your interesting thoughts on an alternative ending. It just shows how may directions this story could have gone in. Thanks for reading, I hope to write more in future. xx
Date: 02/28/16 06:20 am Title: Chapter 6: Time to end it.
Wow. Intense. So intense. And, as dastardly as it is, so very in keeping with your characters. This was a great moment - dark. Nicely done.
Author's Response: Thanks. The twist has been a choice that's divided everyone so glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 02/26/16 11:44 pm Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
Well, now that the story is over, I am able to give a fair judgement on the whole thing.
The story started very well, though they wasted a lot of time dressing up. If that was necessary or not depends on what kind of guys were dealing with.
The twist was pretty gross to me, but I have a feeling that was the intention. The ending does not strike me as happy at all though. Biggest issue I have is that Bobby gets away with everything without any punishment, and is outright rewarded for betraying his best friend! This whole thing is his fault. This sends a really bad message that it's okay to effectively brainwash your friends as you will be better for it in the end. That ain't a good thing to have in any story! I think the good karmic option here would have been that the spell would have required both of them to complete it, otherwise both are stuck. That wouldn't have been a happy ending either but it would have been much more satisfying.
Another issue I have is with the witches. They clearly know what happened. Do they not have an ounce of sympathy in them? One cool thing that could have happened also is that they punish Bobby in someway and invite Scarlett into their cult. They say as long as they're happy, but they know how fake it feels.
That's my two scents. This has not killed my interest for checking out your stories in the future, but I hope extremely fake feeling endings do not become a theme for you. Best of luck in future writing!
Author's Response: Hey, thanks for the long detailed review, I appreciate your advice. I understand the betrayal of Bobby was a risky and slightly dark twist that wouldn't be to everyone's tastes. I thought it would be more interesting and dramatic then my original idea to have Scott go over the deadline because he was enjoying the sex too much and lost track of time. I understand what you're saying about the 'Message' that is put across but for me there is no message to this story, it's simply a wacky race against the clock with a slightly dark twist at the end. That's not to say I don't write stories with positive messages as I have done in the past (The Summer Holiday). I just didn't feel this story needed that. I like your ideas and suggestions on how I could have ended it, it just shows there are many great directions the story could have gone in. Anyway thanks for reading and I'm sorry it didn't satisfy in the end. Hopefully my future work you'll enjoy more. Thanks for reading. xxx
Date: 02/26/16 08:09 pm Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
A good, possibly slightly dark twist at the end with Bobby's actions - but then if all the characters are left happy and oblivious as to what happened (apart from the witches) does that still make it dark? Thanks for making me have to think and use my brain haha! ;)
Author's Response: he-he, I like to make you think, it's what I do ;-) It's hard to decide whether it ended happily or miserably. I guess in the end everyone was happy and that's what matters...right? I'll let you keep on thinking about it. Thanks for reading. xxx
Date: 02/26/16 03:59 pm Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
This story started out nicely. Bobby's betrayal and the consequental identity death of Scott kind of ruined it for me.
A tip: It's NEVER "Would/Could of", It's "Would/Could have".
Author's Response: Sorry to hear that. I admit the betrayal of Bobby was a risky twist. As I mentioned originally it was going to be that they just went over the deadline because they were enjoying the sex too much, I thought this was a little more exciting. Anyway I understand it may not be to everyone's taste. Thanks for reading and reviewing. Ps: Thanks for the tip, every bit of advice goes to improving my dyslexia. xxx .
Date: 02/26/16 09:07 am Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
The ending was good, but you could have done better!
Author's Response: I couldn't really see of another way for it to end to be honest, I thought it was quite fitting. Endings are always hard though, its hard to please everyone. thanks as always for reading and reviewing Roadbandit. xxx
Date: 02/26/16 06:38 am Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
Very good choices. This is one that you could have dragged out forever (unfortunately that sounds like some of mine), but wisely you didn't. It was just the right length for the story, and the surprise was excellent. Can't wait to read your next one.
Author's Response: Thanks Casey, I really wanted this story to be short and fast paced. I feel the length was fitting also. I enjoy long stories but doing the odd short one is a lot of fun. I think I'll be writing more shorter stories in future before I tackle another EPIC! Thanks as always for reading and reviewing. Hopefully i will be back writing soon. xx
Date: 02/26/16 06:22 am Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
Perfect ending and very awesome story loved it and best of luck for the new job and we are always here for you take your time to figure out things and come back with many more stories 😘 thanks
Author's Response: Thanks Sanro, Glad you enjoyed it. Hopefully i won't be absent too long from writing. I will be keeping a keen eye over this website and will upload more stories in future. I can't stay away too long! Thanks for reading. xxx
Date: 02/26/16 05:38 am Title: Chapter 7: Time is Changing
That was great. Love the twist, gave a whole new meaning of love and companionship. I never could have seen it coming.
New job, new experience, just knock 'em dead! I hope you create more work like this in the future.
Author's Response: Thanks. Glad you enjoyed the story and every moment along the way. Hopefully I will be back writing as soon as I can. Thanks for reading and reviewing. xx
Date: 02/23/16 06:11 am Title: Chapter 6: Time to end it.
Oh lol. What a friend Bobby is. A snobish pig I would say. nNow not only stucked as a girl but also lost his/her virginity to his/her ex-best friend. Worst losing all his memory of being Scott. And to think again it's all started with Bobby idea. Scott is really a big time loser.
Author's Response: Yeah he's not the most reliable of friends thats for sure, he truly knows how to stab people in the back. Glad you enjoyed it, one more chapter to go. xx
Date: 02/20/16 03:38 pm Title: Chapter 6: Time to end it.
I had a feeling that Bobby was going to be a jerk. But I also was hoping Scott would have changed. Great chapter. Poor Girl BTW.
Author's Response: Bobby is and always will be a jerk though he believes he's doing them both a favor. Glad you enjoyed the chapter, one more to go. Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 02/20/16 01:09 pm Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
Seriously, don't do this to him....he does not deserve a fate this cruel, betrayed by his best friend, Literally over having a fuck buddy, and being effectively erased from existance.Give us a happy ending.
Author's Response: I'm guessing you're not fond of this plot twist but wait until you've read the last chapter, you can judge for yourself then whether it is a happy or a sad ending. Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 02/20/16 09:40 am Title: Chapter 6: Time to end it.
Omg that evil friend wow shocking that Was a dick move on his part but with Scott not remembering anything hope things go well and yes awesome chapter 😘😻
Author's Response: Thanks. It was very cruel wasn't it but Bobby just couldn't resist. One more chapter to go and you'll see what happened. Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 02/20/16 06:35 am Title: Chapter 6: Time to end it.
What adisgusting piece of shit. How could he do this to his best friend? I sincerely hope this kid finds a way to get revenge. This is just gross...
Author's Response: It was a despicable thing to do wasn't it. Bobby is a selfish guy though I think he believes he was doing them both a favor. One more chapter to go. Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 02/20/16 05:34 am Title: Chapter 6: Time to end it.
Holy cow!!! I sure didn't see this coming. You the boss!
Author's Response: he-he thanks. I knew it would be a shocking twist. Wasn't quite sure what the reaction would be so glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 02/20/16 05:13 am Title: Chapter 6: Time to end it.
Oh god! That made me feel sick to my stomach! How could anyone do that to their best friend! He is basically killing him!
I really really hope you're not gonna do what I think you're gonna do in the last chapter. Bobby dragged him into this mess, and pushes the only repercussions on him!
Author's Response: Thanks for the review, I wouldn't quite say he's 'killed him' that's a bit harsh. he's just changed him if anything. It was a despicable move on Bobby's part but I hope this hasn't ruined the story for you. I will upload the last chapter in the coming week. xx
Date: 02/16/16 10:17 pm Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
Adam as usual, a chapter well done. I love the way you set the situation that he is torn. On one hand he is thoroughly disgusted with the blowjob, and having to sleep with that jackass, but on the other hand he realizes in desperation that the only way to transform back just walked out on him with half hour left to go before the transformation remains permanent. Now it should be interesting to see how he is going to fulfill the curse in such a short time. If it were me, it would be the one time I would abstain from sex. Then I could stay the girl I was always meant to be. You write such a tantalizing story that always leaves me wanting for me. It's almost like foreplay with each part of your story leading up to a climax ;) keep it up and definitely looking forward to more.
Author's Response: Thank you so much. I'm very happy that you're enjoying it. I like how you describe the chapters as foreplay :) I feel the same as I'm writing them. Yes the conflict between not wanting and wanting to go through with it is very entertaining. I agree though if it were me I would wait till midnight and stay a girl but that's not what Scott wants. It's strange how it's fun to write as a character who doesn't want the outcome as you would. 2 more chapters to go, hope you enjoy. Thanks for reading as always. xxx
Date: 02/15/16 03:28 am Title: Chapter 5: Time to get it on
Nice. Now that she's really desperate to spread her legs, what's next - outright begging any males around for sex? Maybe some guy will fuck her at precisely 12:01...
Author's Response: yes he most certainly is desperate now. He's had some truly bad luck and it's going to take a miracle now to save him. 2 more chapters to go! Thanks for reading. xxx
Date: 02/14/16 07:46 pm Title: Chapter 5: Time to get it on
Not sure how the main pervert is able to get off so easily and the one that was more innocent and didn't want to do the whole spying in the first place loses. Oh well.
Author's Response: I guess he's just having a lot of bad luck today. he-he. Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 02/13/16 12:21 pm Title: Chapter 5: Time to get it on
Yeah cruel but fun punishment to read. Now how on earth is he going to break that spell. Oh boy don't tell me he is going to be permanently stuck as Scarlet... :O
Author's Response: Thanks. Yes he is in a pickle thats for sure. Only half an hour to go, he better think of something. Thanks for reading and commenting. xxx
Date: 02/13/16 07:40 am Title: Chapter 5: Time to get it on
Omg so naughty and cruel hehehe so much loved it 😘also after this project can you write something related go vr fantasy in like Post apocalypse setup or whatever but sexy xD
Author's Response: I know, felt so mean writing it he-he. Glad you enjoyed it. I'm not a huge fan of post apocalyptic stories but I am a fan of fantasy. I have no stories in mind yet but perhaps one day I will write something in a fantasy setting. Thanks for the comment. xx
Date: 01/26/16 10:53 pm Title: Chapter 4: Time to party
Great chapter! The story is a slice of deliciousness. You can start to see the effect of the change on Bobby as the female side starts to assert itself. He is getting a little too comfortable in his new role. What I find the most intriguing is whether Scott can stomach a night with Tom or maybe he's kidding himself and that subconsciously he's repulsed by Tom because he really wants to stay female. He knows that he is on a tight deadline and that Tom is the only shot of turning back. Can't wait for the next chapter. As I said great chapter!
Author's Response: Thank you so much! Really appreciate the feedback. It's going to be hard for Scott to do this that's for sure. He's not quite as open minded and adventurous as Bobby but he must do what needs to be done. Thanks for reading and commenting, I will post the next chapter later in the week. xx
Date: 01/25/16 07:56 pm Title: Chapter 4: Time to party
I love this story. I love it that Scott/Scarlett has to dress up like a slut and basically whore herself with the aim of turning back male. Love it that she's going to get fucked by a guy like Tom. I hope, however, the spell is such that they STAY female if they have sex... Finally, I wonder if they'll be more horrified by the sex, or by liking it...
Author's Response: Thanks, glad you're enjoying it. It's a premise that really appealed to me also, the idea of having to do such a humiliating thing in order to save yourself from a worse fate is very intriguing (Though deep down I would actually love this to happen to me!). Not much time left for these girls so you'll see what happens soon! Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 01/25/16 07:38 pm Title: Chapter 4: Time to party
Oh yea loved it totaly it would be awesome to go to fancy girls party as a girl and have total fun 😘 thanks for the update
Author's Response: yeah that would be so much fun, I'll keep dreaming about it and hope it happens one day. Thanks for reading, more to come soon. xx
Date: 01/25/16 07:30 am Title: Chapter 4: Time to party
Some how I think his watch is off a slight bit. Not sure. I can't predict that. Keep up the good work.
Author's Response: Time is difficult to predict. some times an hour can fly by so fast, sometimes 5 minutes can be an eternity. Thanks for reading, glad you're enjoying it. x
Date: 01/19/16 04:59 pm Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
As usual a chapter well done! I love the fact that one of them has to wear a cheerleader outfit ;). The story is building nicely and I can't wait to read the next chapter. Great job!
Author's Response: Yes lots of love for the cheerleader outfit, must bring back memories for you ;-) haha. Glad you're enjoying the story, thanks for reading. xx
Date: 01/18/16 11:29 am Title: Chapter 3: Time to look the part
Well done,very cute,but I'm betting the girls lied to them,if they have sex,then they will be girls forever!
Author's Response: That would be very nasty indeed. Thanks for reading, more to come soon. xx
Date: 01/17/16 11:57 pm Title: Chapter 3: Time to look the part
Aww I hope they make it. Stuck as a girl is cool, but having your memories changed is something I have never really liked
Author's Response: It is a disturbing prospect isn't it. Though I suppose it would make things easier instead of having to get used to being a girl with a male mind. Thanks for reading, more to come soon. xx
Date: 01/17/16 02:42 pm Title: Chapter 3: Time to look the part
I'm starting to get into the story now, will be an interesting experience for the two at the party!
Author's Response: Thanks, glad you're enjoying it. The party will be a strange experience for them that's for sure. xx
Date: 01/17/16 01:25 pm Title: Chapter 3: Time to look the part
Well this was so fun and yes cheerleader outfit is always hot thanks for the update 😘
Author's Response: Glad you enjoyed it, I do see this story as a bit of fun. It's a lot more fast paced and humorous then some of my other stories. Had to be a cheerleader outfit, what else could it have been. ;-) xxx
Date: 01/17/16 06:25 am Title: Chapter 2: Time is ticking
No spells to turn people into men either? Never pass up the chance to have sex, it's in their bloods it seems. But seeing Scott is the curious type here, she's going to make one hell of a gal. The pure one is always the most precious.
That aside, I'd like to ask you something. The way you used "their" for "they're" or "there is" in conversation, was that intentional on your part to give them the casual tongue?
Author's Response: Scott will be the most fun to watch go through this ordeal. I think Bobby has accepted his fate and trying to see the situation as a crazy experience. Scott however cant wait for this to be over. In regards to the mistakes, they aren't deliberate and are sadly a result of my ongoing battle with dyslexia. I apologize for the mistakes and will look out for them in future. Thanks for reading. xx
Date: 01/12/16 12:39 pm Title: Chapter 2: Time is ticking
This story is looking good!!! It's enticing and the line of events are very clear to understand. I like it.
The only thing missing are plot twists and encounters. The characters seems to go from point A to point B without difficulties, all seems to be set, which it is, but you need to mask a little your intentions. This is a clock race, plot twists and little walls are the way to go :P
Bobby and Scott. I like them as main characters, they are normal teenagers doing teenage things, they are believable and I can empathize with them from the start. You set their background quickly, and I can easily understand their friendship. They are two boys perfect for humiliation.
The after change is very funny, Scott turns from insecure into a sobbing girl and bobby from irresponsible into a big sister. I like the changes and I'm craving to know how they will end.
The witches are really wicked. But I'd have liked that the post transformation conversation was slightly more humiliating for Scott and Bobby. There are four witches, but only Emma seems to really participate in the revenge. Emma has a total of twenty six lines, Becky five, Emily three and Madison only two. They don't seem to be different in personality, they seem to be really one person with four bodies.
The scenario and character descriptions are good enough, not very detailed, but I can imagine them without problems.
You got my attention, I will follow this story to the end.
Thx for your time.
Author's Response: Thanks for the long, detailed review, I appreciate the advice. I'm glad you like the characters and how they reacted to their change.They're a fun pair to write about and their predicament is one I hope we can all get invested in. In regards to your comment about plot twists and difficulties I would say there have being a few already and it hasn't been plain sailing. After being turned into girls their first 'obstacle' was to find a way to have sex with a man before midnight. this gave them the idea to head to Craig's party, BUT! There is another 'obstacle' or 'complication' and that is it's a costume party and now they need costumes. These are only two examples but I assure you as the plot progresses there will be some more plot twists and further difficulties for these two. I understand what you say about the witches as Characters. I did write them as if if they are one character, a kind of female Cerberus or hydra if you please. Emma is meant to be the ring leader of the bunch and for that reason she has the most lines. Anyway I take on board all of what you've said and I hope my reply makes sense. Thanks for reading and commenting and I hope you enjoy future chapters. xxx
Date: 01/12/16 12:10 am Title: Chapter 2: Time is ticking
No offense, but you really didn't really give us a convincing reason for them to change back. How will they have a lifetime of hot lesbian sex if they bag some guys before midnight? Here's one reader rooting against your so called protagonists. ;P
Oh yeah. Decent writing for a fun transformation story, but a few typos.
Author's Response: Well the protagonists don't share our enthusiasm to be hot lesbian lovers sadly. I know I would love that but they're holding on to their manhood. Also I'm aware of my typos and will look out for them in future. thanks for reading and commenting. xx
Date: 01/10/16 06:38 am Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
Well, is looking like they are starting to realize that just being a girl doesn't guarantee 'action'. It actually requires acceptance on their part to a greater degree than they initially thought. Can't wait to see how your deft hands set the stage for what you have in store for these guys. Keep it up! Can't wait to read more.
Author's Response: Thanks, This is one of my favorite fantasies, a race against the clock to do something you would never dream of while in the body of a girl. Glad you enjoy the premise also. Like you say being a girl is not a simple click your fingers and get what you want, they have to work for it! Thanks for reading and commenting. xx
Date: 01/08/16 05:33 am Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
Nice start, why do I get the feeling that the witches are going to teach the new girls a few lessons.
Author's Response: Thanks, They have a very cruel plan in mind thats for sure. Thanks for reading next chapter will be up soon. xx
Date: 01/05/16 08:23 pm Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
Wonderful, wonderful! I love it when a plan catches them in their own larsany, a lesson in good health for the new girl members of the club.
Author's Response: he-he, yes they certainly are going to get a taste of their own medicine. Let's see what will happen next. thanks for reading. xxx
Date: 01/04/16 05:09 pm Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
I like the beginning, it's a great start. I'm really looking forward to see how the characters develop and deal with their situation. Nice setup, it will be interesting to see where you are going to take it.
Author's Response: Thanks proudleaf, nice to go on this journey with you again. Look forward to hearing your comments. I'm glad you enjoyed it, more to come soon. xxx
Date: 01/03/16 04:17 am Title: Chapter 1: Time for a spell
I love it! Other than a few mistakes like putting their instead of they're and some confusion in description, it was well written. I hope to see more!
Author's Response: Thanks, glad you liked it. I'll look out for these mistakes in future, thanks for noting them. xx