Date: 06/18/16 06:09 pm Title: Chapter 2 More surprizes
Nice setup, looking forward to more. Congrats on your newborn.
Author's Response: Thank you I've a pretty good idea where this story is heading. Although at times a couple of the characters seem to take it in another direction. Thank you for that too he's pretty demanding but he's a joy as well Cheryl x
Date: 10/14/14 04:57 pm Title: Chapter 1
Start of a good enjoyable story hope the next chapters are up to this standard
Author's Response: Thank you I'm about half way through the next chapter now it will probably be a little shorter than the first but have to see how it goes,
Date: 10/11/14 07:11 pm Title: Chapter 1
Interesting start, I like how you have added in the politics, don't see that very often in these stories.
Work on the spacing a bit more, you want a space after every paragraph, it makes it easier to read, especially on smaller screens.
Also edit it a little more closely, there were some mistakes that are fairly easy to see, like "Frogs and spice and all things nice are what little girls are made of-"
I can't wait to see the next chapter.
Author's Response: In my way of thinking politics always has to added in a story such as this. I think people tend to avoid it or have a fear of raising it which is a pity. Thanks Kent I'll do that next time I never thought about the smaller screen situation. I know I could have kicked myself at the amount of stupid things I'd missed. My dyslexic problems center mainly around grammar, punctuation and organazation. I went through it so many times I think what I'll do next time is leave it a few days then go back to it. Cheryl