You must login (register) to review.
Reviewer: AimeeD Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/11/20 07:09 am Title: Bi

It cute well written story.

Reviewer: Pablo Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 05/25/14 03:34 pm Title: Bi

Okay, I don't know if I should delete my earlier post or not. You didn't go the Ambrose Bierce route after all. I was sure you were going in the direction of his staying male being only a "dream," that he hadn't successfully killed his attacker before the other had a chance to "kill off" Eric. I thought that whole bit with Jess on the cliff was just a dream. One question: which one was the opponent he knifed at the last second?

Author's Response: I'm sorry it didn't end the way you wanted it to but others in the series I have planned will end maybe the way you wanted it too but the whole series has something planed for it, I'm working on son other books first. You can add to the series if you want, feel free. Thanks for the review and I hope you read some stories I have planned :)

Reviewer: Pablo Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 05/25/14 02:17 pm Title: Love actually

Yeah. Your story reminds me of the very first short story that convinced me (many years ago) that I loved to write, and mostly loved to write reality questioning,Twilight Zone-like stories. I write this now, before I go to the next chapter, to say that your story might very well be channeling one long ago written by Ambrose Bierce "An occurrence at the owl creek bridge." Can't wait to see if I'm right. Good job, I love what you've done so far. Too bad, however, you're doing this on an IPhone. You're not catching your grammar errors.

Reviewer: Natasa Jessica Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 05/24/14 04:42 pm Title: Bi

I love all girl game stories. I would write one myself, but a new story I am writing right now would confuse my readers. I can't wait for your next story.

Author's Response: Glad you liked it and I hope you read my future stories: my newest one is anything could happen and should be up later, hope you read it x tell me in a review when your story is up please :)

Reviewer: Natasa Jessica Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 05/08/14 04:47 pm Title: No questions asked

Damn Noah. i hope they turn him into a girl as well.

Author's Response: Thanks for the reviews you have done Natasa, hope you continue reading this series and future stories :)

Author's Response: Thanks for the reviews you have done Natasa, hope you continue reading this series and future stories :)

Reviewer: ChelleyHelm Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/08/14 05:50 pm Title: Dilemma

So I just finished part 4, and I'm loving this world. I really want to see a continuation of this into about a year or so out, but that's just me being greedy.

As reviewing the work? It does need some work grammatically. A lot of the errors here, and with a lot of the new authors here, has to do with spell check. Some times, when you misspell a word it will be in the wrong context for that sentence, or the auto correct some word features have will change it to a word with a different meaning, but same spelling. The best way to fix this is to get an editor who checks for those things, or find a really good auto-checker. There's one that you pay for, and I swear by it called grammarly. It's 20 bucks, but I'm almost positive it would have caught most of these small mistakes that take a reader out of the story momentarily.

Keep up the good work.

Author's Response: Yeah I totally agree, it's done on my iPhone so it is a bit harder but I will try and improve on it. If I get anything way off the mark, just tell me how to correct it and I will make sure I don't make the same mistake. I appreciate the review and hope to see your opinion on future chapters. :)

Reviewer: Natasa Jessica Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/08/14 07:58 am Title: First day

So cute. I wish I were her. I so wish I was part of the girly games.

Reviewer: Ulysses Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/08/14 02:59 am Title: First day

I dont' think I have read the intro to the girly games but it sounds similar to the hunger game. How as the chemical developed and how did it enter Eric's brain? I might have to re-read that part about the battle I do get what the game is trying to do. The weapons are infected with the girly virus and you have to stab someone to get it or see if you can survive without being touched.

Author's Response: Yeah I like the concept of the hunger games and like the idea of a battle for being male so I arrived at this. I suggest you read the first story, its just called annual girly games and this will make things more clear for you but in the future I will explain it more in case you haven't read them in order ok :) as for the chemical, it's put in their body on the day and they hadn't took it out yet. Please keep reading, thanks

Reviewer: Natasa Jessica Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/06/14 04:59 am Title: Love actually

Wow big surprise.

Author's Response: Haha

Reviewer: Natasa Jessica Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/02/14 05:40 am Title: Into battle

I can't wait for more.

Author's Response: Thanks for the review hopefully you've read the first annual girly games. I will have more up soon, I'm two chapters ahead so i'll make final changes and post em up when I have time :)

You must login (register) to review.
TG Storytime uses the eFiction engine and Vanilla discussions. Design by J6P.