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Reviewer: TheMontereyPineapple Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 10/04/19 05:57 pm Title: The day my life took a vacation

Overall good story, good writing, I think though I feel sad that the rapists who raped Linda got away with their actions especially the rapist who raped Linda and her sibling when her sibling name was Sady, and made Linda get pregnant and giving birth to a stillborn I can just imagine how traumatic and heart wrenching that was for Linda, and judging by the actions behavior of the rapists who raped Linda they definitively rape other people before and I feel sad the rapists of Linda especially the rapist who raped Linda and her sibling when her sibling still had the name Sady, and got Linda pregnant and giving birth to a stillborn they didn't even get a good enough punishment for their actions like being castrated and imprison for the rest of their lifes or executed among the painful ways possible after being in prison for 15+ years infact I feel sad the rapists of Linda especially the rapist who raped Linda and her sibling when her sibling still had the name Sady, and made Linda pregnant and giving birth to a stillborn didn't get punished at all and I would of love this story if they did get punished the way they deserve but I admire I kinda that you put the emotional scenes in the story like the rapes that Linda experience, and the tribulations she has to experience because of her rapes, plus getting pregnant as a result of being rape and made to give birth to a stillborn, and her emotionally tearful moving process, and her heart wrenching journey tearful journey to move pass them, like a strong women good story in general man

Reviewer: LORD CRUSADE Signed Report
Date: 02/08/16 07:24 am Title: The day my life took a vacation

Nice!!!

Author's Response: Oh, thank you! I'm rather proud of it myself

Reviewer: a1993 Signed Report
Date: 10/22/15 11:30 am Title: The day my life took a vacation

Guess you went nuts on this story, didnt track so had no notifications. Gues sill read when i get time

Author's Response: Went nuts? No, no, you probably just missed every update. I apparently had a tendency to cause every other author on the site to instantly post their new chapters whenever I updated this, and it rarely stayed on the front page for long. Hope you enjoy it!

Reviewer: Desert Willow Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 10/20/15 10:09 pm Title: Epilogue

Hey there, review time.

I enjoyed the first third of the story the most, to be honest, but the second third of the story held my interest and continued to be good at least in my eyes, by virtue of the story developing and things changing.

Then came the last third. I really don't know what to say about it, other than... It was turbulent for the characters and readers both when you tried to shake things up. Consequences came swinging left and right. Then it was over, and somehow I felt like I was asleep through the final conflict. And I wasn't the mc with necro-lepsy. At least the ending didn't feel underhanded.

Author's Response: Yeah, I know the feeling. I just needed it over, I knew I'd never be more interested in the story than now, and I certainly didn't want to leave this unfinished for yet another year while I struggled to find inspiration. Who knows, I might go back and edit through it, but I don't know how much I'd change

Reviewer: Lethaldaza Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 10/19/15 01:18 pm Title: Epilogue

enjoyable story

Author's Response: Glad you thought so! I lost inspiration for it a number of times, and life got busy and sad and wonderful... it deserves to be finished.

Reviewer: Johanna Bender Signed star Report
Date: 10/19/15 11:05 am Title: The day my life took a vacation

Some good plot, but your writing needs development. The characters sound too wooden and don't have much personality. Also, you shift tense frequently from past to present.

Author's Response: What part did you read to? I do realize the beginning is like that, but I'm not sure about character development... I realize a number of my characters are wooden (looking back on it) but I'm pretty sure I nailed down the shifting tenses later in the story. Keep in mind this was, like, the third story I posted, and I'm just finishing it now two years later. I kinda don't want to edit it so I can look back and see how much I've improved.

Reviewer: The Wedge Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 10/19/15 08:20 am Title: Epilogue

There are alot of un answered questions, but those can wait for part 2. It was a fun wild and wacky ride. Good Job!

Author's Response: I did leave it open for a part 2, didn't I? Who knows if/when I'll get there, though...

Reviewer: AFTB Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 08/21/15 04:04 pm Title: Nightmare

Confusing AS FUCK! I have never in my life before read a story that is as confusing and brainfucky as this.

Is there any real person in this?

My guess is that Jack died in the very beginning and this is his last thoughts before his brain shuts down for good.

Author's Response: Oh wow, I'm laughing harder than I thought I would right now. Glad to see my evil plot worked! Or as you'd probably view it, "plot." Anyhow, I'm working on the next (and one of the last) chapters now

Reviewer: Darkseide Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 08/09/15 02:00 am Title: Nightmare

Yay! The insanity came back! Lots of death lately, you okay? Everything seemed to be getting better, and then... more deaths. Is the Government out to get Linda and co?

Author's Response: More or less, for myself. You'll have to wait to find out what's happening with Linda...

Reviewer: Darkseide Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 08/08/15 11:56 pm Title: I don't even know

I'm going to miss the hilarious outburst. That's been my favorite part of re-reading this. "THE COMMIES OUT ARE TO GET ME!"

Author's Response: Oh, that chapter... yeah, that was very fun to write

Reviewer: KawaiiQueenMe Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 08/07/15 01:48 pm Title: Nightmare

i was really gung ho for this story but the updates are so far inbetween it's hard to keep up... for some reason tho i find myself drawn to see the end many stories i wouldve dropped but i just like these characters to much sooooo ima stick with it lol. probably nit the most helpful comment but it's what i wanna say. :3

Author's Response: You accidentally posted this comment twice. And it is a rather helpful comment, just not directly. I'm glad to see that my characters are memorable enough! I seriously hope to get at least one of my stories (probably this one, if we're being honest) on a more regular schedule until it's finished. Hope I don't have to make you wait all that long, but I'm not in control of what inspiration strikes for...

Reviewer: KawaiiQueenMe Signed Report
Date: 08/07/15 01:48 pm Title: Nightmare

i was really gung ho for this story but the updates are so far inbetween it's hard to keep up... for some reason tho i find myself drawn to see the end many stories i wouldve dropped but i just like these characters to much sooooo ima stick with it lol. probably nit the most helpful comment but it's what i wanna say. :3

Reviewer: Natasa Jacobs Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 08/06/15 06:36 pm Title: Nightmare

So glad this story is back. I have been waiting forever

Author's Response: Glad to hear it! I'm honestly surprised you still remember this, really. I don't plan on leaving it alone that long again, though. I can say that for certain!

Reviewer: Natasa Jessica Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/17/15 05:26 am Title: The cat's out of the bag... but left some fur.

I really like this story still

Author's Response: Awesome to hear! I'm slowly but surely working on the next chapter, though I think it will be out after I update a different story or two.

Reviewer: Robi Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/12/15 06:51 am Title: Deepening trust

Wow, what a story. Its got everything, even Hitler.
I am more interested in dream Jack. How long will it be for him to let go. Resistance is futile.
About to read ch 30.
This must be one of the longest (in time) story. You gotta finish it or I will see you in your dreams and make you finish it.

Author's Response: Thank you! I've been wanting to finish it for some time, but life keeps getting in the way, getting more busy... aside from that, I've got a couple other stories to work on as well, but this is definitely a priority! Glad to see you're enjoying it so much!

Reviewer: Darkseide Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 11/15/14 12:14 am Title: Deepening trust

Wait, what? This is the last updated chapter? Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! I must have more to read! Where is the Cheerleader part?

Author's Response: I'm sorry, there's no more for it quite yet. I don't know when it'll update, either. And if I haven't thrown in the cheerleader part yet, I'm probably not going to... perhaps I should remove that tag.

Reviewer: Kazumy Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 10/06/14 04:21 am Title: Deepening trust

Oh wow now this is an explosive new chapter and i wonder whats in store for linda??
will dee remember and when will clare answer ??
The suspense is great

Author's Response: Thank you, glad to hear you're enjoying the story so far!

Reviewer: dgenerateaaron Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 10/06/14 12:00 am Title: Deepening trust

Wow, first off i wanna say congratulations for makin it 1 year workin on this excellent story, and the other is i enjoyed readin these last 2 entries. Good job and keep it up. Don't worry about the delay we can understand how hard things may or may not be. Keep your head up and never give up

Author's Response: Thanks! Glad you liked it!

Reviewer: Kazumy Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 09/03/14 05:37 pm Title: In the hospital

Oh my so many questions it seems she's practically remembering who she was and what happened give or take..
Now I wonder what some of those answers will be

Author's Response: Glad to hear I'm making you think! Hopefully I can answer those questions soon.

Reviewer: Natasa Jessica Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 08/13/14 07:48 pm Title: Waking Up

Story is getting better. I didn't like the last chapter. Kinda confused me.

Author's Response: In the latest chapter, Linda's getting back in touch with reality and facing the consequences of actions she couldn't control. I also clarified that chapter 26 was actually not real, just Linda's brain roaming free and coming up with it's own situations in a dream-like fashion.

Reviewer: froghorntx Signed Report
Date: 07/15/14 12:08 am Title: The Death of Officer Ford

By any chance did you take LSD before you wrote this?

Author's Response: *Laughs* No, you're just reading the by-product of the very depths of the most twisted and dark areas of my brain. Never touched a drug in my life.

Reviewer: Kazumy Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 07/14/14 11:08 pm Title: Waking Up

Dang of a doozy chapter the story gets more complex and i'm thrust deeper in it

Author's Response: Glad you're enjoying it so much! And yes, this story is getting more and more complex to the point that I have to go review or write notes down for chapters.

Reviewer: dgenerateaaron Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 07/14/14 05:17 pm Title: Waking Up

Nice work. What happened to her hand? I liked the way you did this chapter. Keep up the good work and can't wait for the next chapter

Author's Response: In Chapter 25, she cut it off so that It wouldn't eat her hand.

Reviewer: Cosmicbrambleclaw Signed Report
Date: 06/28/14 10:33 pm Title: A new boyfriend

such a sad chapter (12) :'( made me cry when I read bout Jen and how Cory and Tina hooked up and made Linda hurt inside (so fricken sad! but i cant stop reading)

Author's Response: Glad you can't stop! It always excites me to see that my writing is affecting people the way I want it to. Hope you enjoy the rest!

Reviewer: froghorntx Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 06/28/14 09:40 pm Title: An interesting situation

Up until the last 2 chapters, the story was great; good writing. The last 2 chapters were way over the top, and they needed some kind of bridge from the others to explain why and how things got so crazy

Author's Response: The second to last chapter was Linda's prion acting up again and causing some symptoms, and the last one was explained in the very last paragraph, if you can infer. The last one will also be explained a bit more in the beginning of the next chapter (whenever that may be)

Reviewer: Ryker Signed Report
Date: 06/20/14 06:22 am Title: An interesting situation

Oh, what a twist at the end! Now I have to wait to see who's POV dominates the story?

Reviewer: Kazumy Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 06/19/14 09:55 pm Title: An interesting situation

It was all a dream.... !!!!
I was going.. what,who, why??? how??
Dang doozy chapter and can't wait to read more

Author's Response: That's exactly how I want you to feel

Reviewer: Kazumy Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 06/07/14 06:31 pm Title: The Death of Officer Ford

Wha t happened ?? that was the best roller coaster i've seen / read...
Too bad the staypuff guy didn't show ..lol

Author's Response: What happened? Linda's disease mutated, causing some side effects. And now you made me wish I had put the staypuff guy in. Totally forgot to. Thanks for reading!

Reviewer: Freya Roversdottir Signed Report
Date: 05/20/14 08:37 am Title: The day my life took a vacation

I've finally found the rest of the story!

I've thought it was abandoned after seeing it but with a few chapters on Fictionmania.

Suffice to say, my searching was well rewarded :P

Author's Response: On Fictionmania? I'm going to have to check that out, I don't remember posting anything on Fictionmania... ever... Really glad you like it, though! And thank you for bringing that to my attention.

Reviewer: Natasa Jessica Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 05/16/14 07:08 am Title: The Graduation of Officer Ford

I'm really enjoying your story. When I see it posted, I squeal with excitment. I just wonder if Linda ad Dee will be girlfriends eventually.

Author's Response: I really loved to hear your reaction! I didn't think anybody would react that way to my stories... I guess you're just going to have to wait to find out about Dee and Linda, though.

Reviewer: Desert Willow Signed Report
Date: 05/16/14 01:50 am Title: The Graduation of Officer Ford

I see you've bypassed the need for a police academy (as well as the two years officers typically spend working in prisons). Interesting.

Also, I've noticed that you have embraced the art of cliffhanging. Good, goood... Let the art flow through you.

Author's Response: Yeah, I'm not too sure what the academy really consists of, and Linda's a natural. And the cliffhanger is justifiable! You just don't know it yet.

Reviewer: Kazumy Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 05/15/14 09:49 pm Title: The Graduation of Officer Ford

Yay graduation time for the girls ..
But what her scream so loud??
Too much suspense :)

Author's Response: You'll find out next chapter. Yes, indeed... I've been waiting for this upcoming moment... That's probably not helping. Sorry.

Reviewer: blackbear Signed starstar Report
Date: 04/21/14 12:32 am Title: The day my life took a vacation

I was sort of into this at first but honestly, this story just isn't for me.

Moves WAY too fast. It seems like I'll miss one sentence in the middle of a paragraph and suddenly a month has passed in-story. There's not enough physical descriptions, there are so many characters and names it's confusing, and although it's already been said, the lines upon lines of just dialogue with no names makes this almost unreadable.

Also some decisions don't really make sense... for example, Linda/Jack already tried to commit suicide twice and had pretty clearly stated she doesn't care about anything or anyone. She then is hit with the news that her rapist impregnated her, and she immediately refuses an abortion just... cause?

That doesn't make any sense at all. Your entire story before that set her up with the attitude of complete defiance. I'd expect her to be running to the abortion clinic. I'm realizing most stories on these kind of sites are very obviously pro-life, but still, that part was so out of character it completely took me out of the story.

Keep writing though and keep improving. Just my thoughts

Author's Response: I understand. Thanks for giving it a shot, at least!

Reviewer: Kazumy Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/19/14 11:35 pm Title: Dee's developments

Incredible new chapter and that ending for this part got me as being ironic as the threat manifested ..
Please continue this story

Author's Response: Oh, it will continue. That I guarantee. Unless some terrible fate befalls me, in which case I will apologize for the delay.

Reviewer: Towny365 Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/08/14 04:13 pm Title: Spread

Love the length of it, helps get to know how the characters react in different situations, should make it into a film lol

Author's Response: Wow, I didn't realize my work merited such a response! I'm honored.

Reviewer: Kazumy Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/08/14 12:23 am Title: Spread

Oh my!!!! This new chapter just gripped me in it's clutches and at tye nd i'm still saying " no... " I need to know what happens next!!! * giggles *
Can't wait for the next one :)

Author's Response: Sorry, but you're going to have to wait. Hopefully I can get it out quicker than last time though.

Reviewer: Kazumy Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/05/14 10:50 am Title: The day my life took a vacation

Thank you for your reply I can't wait to continue reading your story :D

Author's Response: I'm working on the next chapter now, I hope you don't have to wait long!

Reviewer: Kazumy Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 04/04/14 02:56 pm Title: Yet another hospital visit

Please continue this story !!!!!
You have captivated and have me in your grip, i wanna know more and see what happens next.

Author's Response: Don't worry, I'm working on it! I'll try and have it out in a few day's time. Sorry for making you wait.

Reviewer: Ryker Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/21/14 08:50 pm Title: The day my life took a vacation

Glad you got back to this story. I'm having a blast trying to follow your zany characters! It's a thrilling, hectic ride. Keep it up!

Author's Response: Thanks! I'll try to get the next chapter out soon, but no guarantees.

Reviewer: trolololking Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 03/21/14 06:40 am Title: The day my life took a vacation

Damn that last chapter, got me fixed.

Author's Response: That's what I was hoping for!

Reviewer: Stradinius Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/27/14 12:50 pm Title: Holidays

It wasn't all that bad, not bad enough to be Deviant in my opinion... But I'm a twisted person, so things like that from me mean nothing!

Author's Response: I say that the one part of the line between Explicit and Deviant is with incest (or pretty much any warning aside from death unless it is quite gruesome)

Reviewer: Nathriel Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 02/07/14 04:48 am Title: Developments in my life

This is one twisted world you've created and frankly, I enjoyed the hell out of it. Looking forward to what you write next!

Author's Response: Sorry for the delay in the response, but thank you!

Reviewer: Stradinius Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 01/26/14 06:53 am Title: The Wedding!

I can already see the...wait...it's hard to explain...
Hooray for references!
Also, last sentence, my brain died a little.

Reviewer: Natasa Jessica Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 01/22/14 08:27 am Title: Reunited

I was like NOOOOOOOO Dawn NOOOOOOO! But then she said she wished to be a girl again.
I'm not Transphobic, I am transgender myself, I just was surprised that happened. Hoping for 2 twin girls.

Reviewer: girlygirls Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 01/12/14 06:45 pm Title: Sady returns

Great story I can't wait until the next chapter.

Author's Response: Thanks!

Reviewer: bilibull Signed Report
Date: 12/29/13 11:42 pm Title: My new job

i been reading this for the past 4-5 hours maybe (am a slow reader i know) and i must say, You sir have managed to make me even more scared of this Magical gender change (as it wasn't bad before gender change being my only nightmare) but you also manage to confuse the HELL out of me,look am not saying the story is bad by any stretch of the imagination, but it is Confusing at times and extremely hard to understand the Chronological/Narrative style that you chose.
Again the story is really good, i wouldn't have read it all till now if it wasn't but try to somehow show who is talking so it doesn't confuse us the reader.

Overall till now the story is a 8/10 from me, with some good mystery and a lot of dark story behind it, Keep up the good work kind Sir and make this world a more insane place then a crazy asylum!

Author's Response: Thank you very much! I'm trying to get better at showing the reader who's talking, but whenever I go over it I always think it sounds funny to me and end up with this kind of thing. Thank you again for reading and for leaving a constructive review!

Reviewer: Liam Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 12/13/13 12:15 pm Title: Devastation at it's peak

I've enjoy this story a lot, and it's plot twists. Though, it does get slightly confusing as who is talking at some points. But, all in all, a great story!

Author's Response: Trying to work on that, thank you!

Reviewer: Princess_Panty_boy 92646 Signed Report
Date: 11/18/13 10:23 am Title: The day my life took a vacation

Fun story Hun I hope you continue. Thanks for sharing.

Hugs,
Princess panty boy

Author's Response: I'll make sure I continue! It may be a while, though. Thank you!

Reviewer: TheMadPoet Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 11/06/13 02:14 am Title: Devastation at it's peak

I really enjoy this story! I've had a great time reading it so far and I'm excited to continue.

Keep up the good work!
The Mad Poet

Author's Response: Thanks! Working on it now!

Reviewer: truefan Signed half-star Report
Date: 10/30/13 10:32 pm Title: Devastation at it's peak

awfull chaptor

Author's Response: Really sorry, I was just feeling a bit down lately and I guess it showed in my writing. I'll try to make the next one better!

Reviewer: truefan Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 10/10/13 12:06 am Title: I don't even know

wtf. looking forword to your next chaptor but can we please keep the random crazy stuff out? i had no idea what was going on and who was who for most of this chaptor.

Author's Response: Sorry. Linda pretty much went insane in this chapter, and I'll try to keep who's who known

Reviewer: Trinity Signed starstarstarstar Report
Date: 10/03/13 12:32 am Title: The school sees me for the first time

I like what you've done with Linda and the people around her, but I am having a really hard time figuring out who is talking when you have all the quotes back to back.

Author's Response: Sorry, sorry. I'll make sure to put nicknames for everybody in so it's not as big an issue.

Reviewer: AthenaCupcake Signed starstarstarhalf-star Report
Date: 10/02/13 05:02 pm Title: The day my life took a vacation

I really like the story but it is a bit hard to differenciate between the characters in the dialog. Other than that keep on writing! I really like the concept :)

Author's Response: Sorry, I try to make it less confusing by adding names and such, but my style of writing can be quite confusing.

Reviewer: truefan Signed starstarstarstarstar Report
Date: 09/21/13 11:18 pm Title: The day my life took a vacation

not bad at all.

Author's Response: Thank you! I appreciate it!

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